Don Cheadle and Whatever
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=VaVH58J0ia0&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DVaVH58J0ia0
Friday, January 31, 2014
Thursday, January 30, 2014
The Clydesdale and the Puppy
Friendships can withstand the norm...of yesterday, today or tomorrow
Friends can withstand the challenges of time, distance, chance and logic...
Friendships can last lengths surpassing lifetimes...can extend beyond eternity...exist in infinity
http://blog.zap2it.com/frominsidethebox/2014/01/m-budweiser-super-bowl-ad-the-clydesdales-get-a-puppy-so-get-ready-to-cry.html
Friends can withstand the challenges of time, distance, chance and logic...
Friendships can last lengths surpassing lifetimes...can extend beyond eternity...exist in infinity
http://blog.zap2it.com/frominsidethebox/2014/01/m-budweiser-super-bowl-ad-the-clydesdales-get-a-puppy-so-get-ready-to-cry.html
Monday, January 27, 2014
The "King of Fruits"
Otherwise known as Durian
As seen on the show Portlandia
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=tmitvXIamFc&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DtmitvXIamFc
As seen on the show Portlandia
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=tmitvXIamFc&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DtmitvXIamFc
Friday, January 24, 2014
Factors for Successful Relationships
Decades' worth of research has attempted to pinpoint what, exactly, makes a couple happy. Scientists have followed relationships over the course of years, administered surveys and studied pre-existing data to give the rest of us insightful nuggets of information.
So, who's really the happiest with their significant other? Here's the picture you get when you cobble together the results of various studies on relationships -- a totally implausible pair that reminds us not to put too much stock in these things. There's no reason to force yourself into this idealistic mold when every relationship is, of course, different. But that said, the science is fascinating.
And so, according to research, the happiest couple is...
Not big on texting.
Last year, researchers at Brigham Young University found that couples who apologize, hash out problems or make decisions via text message tend to be less happy in their relationship. Use that handy "call" feature on your phones, people.
Childless.
A 2014 Open University study of 5,000 people of all ages in long-term relationships found that childless married and unmarried couples were happiest.
Married, or not. It's whatever.
A 2012 study in the Journal of Marriage and Family reported few benefits of being married vs. being in a long-term relationship and living together. Marriage was correlated with slight health gains -- probably due to shared healthcare plans -- but there were no significant benefits over cohabitation without tying the knot.
Not fighting a lot anymore, but definitely was at one point.
A 2012 Florida State study found that couples who had "angry but honest" conversations early on in their relationship were happier in the long run.
A first-born and a last-born.
Some psychologists say that when a youngest and oldest child couple up, you've got one person who generally enjoys being taken care of and one who tends to take care of others. This is one of the happiest pairings, according to researchers who believe birth order has a strong effect on relationships.
Not bored.
Boredom begets a feeling of greater distance and unhappiness, say the results of a 2009 study published in the academic journal Psychological Science. Couples asked to select one of seven pairs of circles overlapping in various amounts to represent their marriage were most likely to select separated circles -- representing emotional separation between themselves and their partner -- when bored.
Contributing equally to the household.
Those who agree to share household chores and clearly outline each person's responsibilities are more likely to feel satisfied in their relationship, according to a UCLA study conducted between 2001 and 2004.
Gay...
Britain's 2014 Open University recently published a study [of 5,000 people] suggesting gay couples are "happier and more positive" about their relationships. Heterosexual couples, on the other hand, were found less likely to make time for each other, pursue shared interests and communicate well.
Or straight and feminist...
A 2007 Rutgers study of over 500 individuals found that men and women with feminist partners were more satisfied in their heterosexual relationships.
With a pretty lady and a less-attractive gentleman.
A good-looking wife leads men (and, interestingly, the wives themselves) to feel more satisfied in their marriages, according to a 2013 study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. The same didn't hold true when husbands believed themselves to be better looking than their wives.
Not into online gaming.
Unless both play. But still, a 2012 study by Brigham Young University researchers found that out of 349 married gamers, 75 percent of their spouses wished their partners would put more effort into their marriage. The researchers posited that it's the hours spent on the game instead of engaging in daily routines that make a difference.
A lot alike...
Couples who shared many of the same traits -- such as "ambitious" or "artistic" -- were predicted to have increased levels of happiness in long-term relationships, according to researchers. “If your partner is helping you become a better person," one researcher told the New York Times, "you become happier and more satisfied in the relationship.”
But without a lot of overlapping Facebook friends.
According to a report that looked at 1.3 million Facebook users, published by employees of the site in 2013, relationship staying power depends on "social dispersion." Couples whose mutual friends know each other are more likely to break up, while couples whose friend circles don't overlap much stay together longer.
Equally thrifty.
A 2009 University of Michigan survey of 1,000 married and unmarried people showed that people tend to choose their spending opposite in marriage -- i.e. over-spenders tend to go for partners who budget carefully -- but that decision leads to more fights and less satisfaction. The happiest couples spend money the same way, whether that means a tendency to splurge or to save.
Very sexually active...
The authors of the 2004 paper "Money, Sex, and Happiness: An Empirical Study" estimate that increasing sexual activity from once a month to once a week increases happiness by the same amount as getting paid an extra $50,000 per year. In a 2011 Australian study of over 6,500 people in long-term relationships, a majority of men and 42 percent of women said they were unhappy with their sex lives -- mostly due to a lack of it.
But took it slow at the start of the relationship.
A 2012 Cornell University study suggested a positive link between waiting over a month to have sex at the beginning of a relationship and perception of long-term satisfaction (at least in women).
Well-rested.
A 2009 University of Arizona study found that better sleep helps men feel better about their relationship, and women who sleep poorly often reported having problems in their relationship.
College-educated.
A 2010 Pew study found a link between college education and the risk of divorce -- that is, people with college degrees were less likely to divorce than their less-educated counterparts. A University of Pittsburgh sociologist also found education and intelligence to be one of the most desirable traits in a partner.
Not winning Oscars.
The "Oscar Curse" is a real thing, say researchers from the University of Toronto. Women who won Oscars between 1936 to 2010 were 1.68 times more likely to divorce, the 2011 report found. Men, however, didn't seem to be significantly affected.
Laughing at the same jokes.
Laughter is good for everyone, but researchers have argued that it's particularly beneficial to long-term relationships. In one study of couples married for at least 45 years, published in 1990, sense of humor was among the top three reasons given for the pair's success.
Genuinely happy for each other.
People who celebrated their partner's achievements as if they were their own experienced greater relationship satisfaction than those who reacted with indifference or belittled the news, according to a study published in The Journal of Personality and Social Psychology in 2006.
Surrounded by people who aren't divorced.
Brown University researchers unveiled a study last year suggesting that married people are 75 percent more likely to divorce if a friend has already done so, and 33 percent more likely if a friend of a friend divorces.
On the same level of drunkenness. Or sobriety.
Couples with uneven drinking habits -- where one was a heavy drinker and the other not -- are significantly more likely to split, a 2013 University at Buffalo Research Institute study found.
Sound like anyone you know? Yeah, maybe not.
What works for some people, mes chers, is of course not bound to work for everyone. The person who does fewer chores might make up for it by cooking amazing meals for their partner, or the couple that spends money differently might also keep separate bank accounts. Two first-borns could break their Type-A molds and stick together forever.
While interesting to read about, researchers likely won't ever be able to give us a recipe for the perfect couple. There are always outliers in any study, and the findings of research like this is likely to change as relationships, as well as the people in them, continue to evolve.
Article by Sara Boboltz
"This Is The Happiest Relationship Ever, according to Science"
So, who's really the happiest with their significant other? Here's the picture you get when you cobble together the results of various studies on relationships -- a totally implausible pair that reminds us not to put too much stock in these things. There's no reason to force yourself into this idealistic mold when every relationship is, of course, different. But that said, the science is fascinating.
And so, according to research, the happiest couple is...
Not big on texting.
Last year, researchers at Brigham Young University found that couples who apologize, hash out problems or make decisions via text message tend to be less happy in their relationship. Use that handy "call" feature on your phones, people.
Childless.
A 2014 Open University study of 5,000 people of all ages in long-term relationships found that childless married and unmarried couples were happiest.
Married, or not. It's whatever.
A 2012 study in the Journal of Marriage and Family reported few benefits of being married vs. being in a long-term relationship and living together. Marriage was correlated with slight health gains -- probably due to shared healthcare plans -- but there were no significant benefits over cohabitation without tying the knot.
Not fighting a lot anymore, but definitely was at one point.
A 2012 Florida State study found that couples who had "angry but honest" conversations early on in their relationship were happier in the long run.
A first-born and a last-born.
Some psychologists say that when a youngest and oldest child couple up, you've got one person who generally enjoys being taken care of and one who tends to take care of others. This is one of the happiest pairings, according to researchers who believe birth order has a strong effect on relationships.
Not bored.
Boredom begets a feeling of greater distance and unhappiness, say the results of a 2009 study published in the academic journal Psychological Science. Couples asked to select one of seven pairs of circles overlapping in various amounts to represent their marriage were most likely to select separated circles -- representing emotional separation between themselves and their partner -- when bored.
Contributing equally to the household.
Those who agree to share household chores and clearly outline each person's responsibilities are more likely to feel satisfied in their relationship, according to a UCLA study conducted between 2001 and 2004.
Gay...
Britain's 2014 Open University recently published a study [of 5,000 people] suggesting gay couples are "happier and more positive" about their relationships. Heterosexual couples, on the other hand, were found less likely to make time for each other, pursue shared interests and communicate well.
Or straight and feminist...
A 2007 Rutgers study of over 500 individuals found that men and women with feminist partners were more satisfied in their heterosexual relationships.
With a pretty lady and a less-attractive gentleman.
A good-looking wife leads men (and, interestingly, the wives themselves) to feel more satisfied in their marriages, according to a 2013 study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. The same didn't hold true when husbands believed themselves to be better looking than their wives.
Not into online gaming.
Unless both play. But still, a 2012 study by Brigham Young University researchers found that out of 349 married gamers, 75 percent of their spouses wished their partners would put more effort into their marriage. The researchers posited that it's the hours spent on the game instead of engaging in daily routines that make a difference.
A lot alike...
Couples who shared many of the same traits -- such as "ambitious" or "artistic" -- were predicted to have increased levels of happiness in long-term relationships, according to researchers. “If your partner is helping you become a better person," one researcher told the New York Times, "you become happier and more satisfied in the relationship.”
But without a lot of overlapping Facebook friends.
According to a report that looked at 1.3 million Facebook users, published by employees of the site in 2013, relationship staying power depends on "social dispersion." Couples whose mutual friends know each other are more likely to break up, while couples whose friend circles don't overlap much stay together longer.
Equally thrifty.
A 2009 University of Michigan survey of 1,000 married and unmarried people showed that people tend to choose their spending opposite in marriage -- i.e. over-spenders tend to go for partners who budget carefully -- but that decision leads to more fights and less satisfaction. The happiest couples spend money the same way, whether that means a tendency to splurge or to save.
Very sexually active...
The authors of the 2004 paper "Money, Sex, and Happiness: An Empirical Study" estimate that increasing sexual activity from once a month to once a week increases happiness by the same amount as getting paid an extra $50,000 per year. In a 2011 Australian study of over 6,500 people in long-term relationships, a majority of men and 42 percent of women said they were unhappy with their sex lives -- mostly due to a lack of it.
But took it slow at the start of the relationship.
A 2012 Cornell University study suggested a positive link between waiting over a month to have sex at the beginning of a relationship and perception of long-term satisfaction (at least in women).
Well-rested.
A 2009 University of Arizona study found that better sleep helps men feel better about their relationship, and women who sleep poorly often reported having problems in their relationship.
College-educated.
A 2010 Pew study found a link between college education and the risk of divorce -- that is, people with college degrees were less likely to divorce than their less-educated counterparts. A University of Pittsburgh sociologist also found education and intelligence to be one of the most desirable traits in a partner.
Not winning Oscars.
The "Oscar Curse" is a real thing, say researchers from the University of Toronto. Women who won Oscars between 1936 to 2010 were 1.68 times more likely to divorce, the 2011 report found. Men, however, didn't seem to be significantly affected.
Laughing at the same jokes.
Laughter is good for everyone, but researchers have argued that it's particularly beneficial to long-term relationships. In one study of couples married for at least 45 years, published in 1990, sense of humor was among the top three reasons given for the pair's success.
Genuinely happy for each other.
People who celebrated their partner's achievements as if they were their own experienced greater relationship satisfaction than those who reacted with indifference or belittled the news, according to a study published in The Journal of Personality and Social Psychology in 2006.
Surrounded by people who aren't divorced.
Brown University researchers unveiled a study last year suggesting that married people are 75 percent more likely to divorce if a friend has already done so, and 33 percent more likely if a friend of a friend divorces.
On the same level of drunkenness. Or sobriety.
Couples with uneven drinking habits -- where one was a heavy drinker and the other not -- are significantly more likely to split, a 2013 University at Buffalo Research Institute study found.
Sound like anyone you know? Yeah, maybe not.
What works for some people, mes chers, is of course not bound to work for everyone. The person who does fewer chores might make up for it by cooking amazing meals for their partner, or the couple that spends money differently might also keep separate bank accounts. Two first-borns could break their Type-A molds and stick together forever.
While interesting to read about, researchers likely won't ever be able to give us a recipe for the perfect couple. There are always outliers in any study, and the findings of research like this is likely to change as relationships, as well as the people in them, continue to evolve.
Article by Sara Boboltz
"This Is The Happiest Relationship Ever, according to Science"
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
Pastor Jarrid gets his cake...and Eats it too!
On Jarrid’s blog post titled, “I’m Dating Someone Even Thought I’m Married,” he writes:
“I have a confession to make. I’m dating someone even though I’m married.
She’s an incredible girl. She’s beautiful, smart, cunning, strong, and has an immensely strong faith in God. I love to take her out to dinner, movies, local shows, and always tell her how beautiful she is. I can’t remember the last time I was mad at her for longer than five minutes, and her smile always seems to brighten up my day no matter the circumstances.
Sometimes she will visit me at work unannounced, make me an incredible lunch, or even surprise me with something she personally baked. I can’t believe how lucky I am to be dating someone even though I am married. I encourage you to try it and see what it can do for your life.
Oh! Did I mention the woman I am dating is my wife? What did you expect?
Just because you’re married, doesn’t mean your dating life should end.
I need to continue to date my wife even after I marry her. Pursuing my wife shouldn’t stop just because we both said, “I do.” Way too many times do I see relationships stop growing because people stop taking the initiative to pursue one another.
Dating is a time where you get to learn about someone in a special and unique way. Why would you want that to ever stop? It shouldn’t. Those butterflies you got on the first date shouldn’t stop just because the years have passed. Wake up each day and pursue your spouse as if you are still on your first few dates. You will see a drastic change for the better in your relationship.
When it comes to any relationship, communication and the action of constant pursuit is key. Nobody wants to be with someone who doesn’t want to pursue them whole-heartedly.
I encourage you to date your spouse, pursue them whole-heartedly, and understand that dating shouldn’t end just because you said, “I do.”
- Jarrid Wilson”
"This Man Is Dating Someone Even Though He’s Married. Sounds Disgusting, But I’m On His Side."
Jarrid Wilson is a husband, pastor, author, and blogger. And this is his confession.
“I have a confession to make. I’m dating someone even though I’m married.
She’s an incredible girl. She’s beautiful, smart, cunning, strong, and has an immensely strong faith in God. I love to take her out to dinner, movies, local shows, and always tell her how beautiful she is. I can’t remember the last time I was mad at her for longer than five minutes, and her smile always seems to brighten up my day no matter the circumstances.
Sometimes she will visit me at work unannounced, make me an incredible lunch, or even surprise me with something she personally baked. I can’t believe how lucky I am to be dating someone even though I am married. I encourage you to try it and see what it can do for your life.
Oh! Did I mention the woman I am dating is my wife? What did you expect?
Just because you’re married, doesn’t mean your dating life should end.
I need to continue to date my wife even after I marry her. Pursuing my wife shouldn’t stop just because we both said, “I do.” Way too many times do I see relationships stop growing because people stop taking the initiative to pursue one another.
Dating is a time where you get to learn about someone in a special and unique way. Why would you want that to ever stop? It shouldn’t. Those butterflies you got on the first date shouldn’t stop just because the years have passed. Wake up each day and pursue your spouse as if you are still on your first few dates. You will see a drastic change for the better in your relationship.
When it comes to any relationship, communication and the action of constant pursuit is key. Nobody wants to be with someone who doesn’t want to pursue them whole-heartedly.
I encourage you to date your spouse, pursue them whole-heartedly, and understand that dating shouldn’t end just because you said, “I do.”
- Jarrid Wilson”
"This Man Is Dating Someone Even Though He’s Married. Sounds Disgusting, But I’m On His Side."
Jarrid Wilson is a husband, pastor, author, and blogger. And this is his confession.
Best Dating Advice
Someone asked me this week, "What is the one piece of dating advice you can give that is guaranteed to work?" It didn't take me long at all to answer this. It did, however, take me a long time to figure it out.
We are inundated with dating and relationship advice in books, seminars, webinars, columns, therapists, movies, television and the ever-present and mostly unsolicited advice from our married friends. However, before we can ever begin to follow any rules or advice, we must absolutely implement this one simple, yet so profound step. It is guaranteed to work. I promise that your relationships will change for the better.
This one step sounds so simple and may even be laughable to some. It's often overlooked. It's easier said than done. Ready?
Love yourself first. That's it. Love yourself before anyone else.
I know many of you may be thinking the exact same thing I thought when I first heard this. Of course I love myself. But how many times do we beat ourselves up for wrong decisions we've made? Or judge ourselves over how much we weigh? Or put ourselves down because we're not where we thought we'd be at a certain age in life? Or stay angry with ourselves because we broke a promise we said we'd keep to ourselves? Being gentle and forgiving with ourselves is the first step in loving ourselves first.
Think of yourself as a little 8-year-old girl. Would you talk to her the same way you talk to yourself now? Probably not. You would want to hold that little girl in your arms, telling her it's OK. Giving her compliments and encouragement. Telling her she is beautiful and strong. Telling her we all make mistakes and we learn and grow and do better from them.
If you are yearning for love in your life, how much love are you giving yourself? You want attention from a man, but how much attention are you giving yourself, doing the things that bring you joy in life? You wish your man would give you more compliments, but how many times do you compliment yourself?
We are taught that being selfish is a bad thing. That we should think of others first. But as my wonderful mentor and intuitive healer Teresa Brandise has taught me, airline flight attendants tell you to put your own oxygen mask on first before putting one on a child for a reason. We can't take care of another until we take care of ourselves first. And we can never expect to receive love from another unless we love ourselves first. So we learn that becoming "self-ish," being loving to ourselves first, is a good thing!
All the love we ever need is truly inside of us. Once we are able to connect to that love, we become magnets drawing in others that also love themselves as much as we love ourselves. And that's where the magic happens. We no longer look to others to complete us (thank you, Jerry Maguire, for making us think otherwise). We know that we are whole, complete and loving beings and we are able to share ourselves with another instead of being dependent upon them for our happiness. We then complement each other's lives instead of falling into the interdependence trap in which partners rely on each other for their individual need fulfillment.
Try this for three weeks. It sounds hokey and new age-y, but it will flip a switch on your self-worth, thus changing the direction of your relationships with others. Look in the mirror each morning and tell yourself "I love you." Give yourself a compliment or two. You may laugh, feel silly and you may even get to a point where you cry. Whatever you feel is OK. Just do it for three weeks. Watch as your inner strength rises, you find more confidence and you care less what others think of you. You come into alignment with your authentic self. People will compliment you on your outward self because they see your inner self, or soul, shining. Your love for yourself will be evident to all around you!
Just like any other practice, self-love takes dedication. Nurture, compliment and give yourself attention on a daily basis. Practice this one simple step before you try any other relationship rules, regulations or advice. And if you find things not going right in your life or relationships, remember to turn inward and love you first!
Article by Kelley Whitis
"The One Piece of Dating advice guaranteed to Work"
Writer and Founder of: Linda's Voice, A non-profit ending domestic abuse
We are inundated with dating and relationship advice in books, seminars, webinars, columns, therapists, movies, television and the ever-present and mostly unsolicited advice from our married friends. However, before we can ever begin to follow any rules or advice, we must absolutely implement this one simple, yet so profound step. It is guaranteed to work. I promise that your relationships will change for the better.
This one step sounds so simple and may even be laughable to some. It's often overlooked. It's easier said than done. Ready?
Love yourself first. That's it. Love yourself before anyone else.
I know many of you may be thinking the exact same thing I thought when I first heard this. Of course I love myself. But how many times do we beat ourselves up for wrong decisions we've made? Or judge ourselves over how much we weigh? Or put ourselves down because we're not where we thought we'd be at a certain age in life? Or stay angry with ourselves because we broke a promise we said we'd keep to ourselves? Being gentle and forgiving with ourselves is the first step in loving ourselves first.
Think of yourself as a little 8-year-old girl. Would you talk to her the same way you talk to yourself now? Probably not. You would want to hold that little girl in your arms, telling her it's OK. Giving her compliments and encouragement. Telling her she is beautiful and strong. Telling her we all make mistakes and we learn and grow and do better from them.
If you are yearning for love in your life, how much love are you giving yourself? You want attention from a man, but how much attention are you giving yourself, doing the things that bring you joy in life? You wish your man would give you more compliments, but how many times do you compliment yourself?
We are taught that being selfish is a bad thing. That we should think of others first. But as my wonderful mentor and intuitive healer Teresa Brandise has taught me, airline flight attendants tell you to put your own oxygen mask on first before putting one on a child for a reason. We can't take care of another until we take care of ourselves first. And we can never expect to receive love from another unless we love ourselves first. So we learn that becoming "self-ish," being loving to ourselves first, is a good thing!
All the love we ever need is truly inside of us. Once we are able to connect to that love, we become magnets drawing in others that also love themselves as much as we love ourselves. And that's where the magic happens. We no longer look to others to complete us (thank you, Jerry Maguire, for making us think otherwise). We know that we are whole, complete and loving beings and we are able to share ourselves with another instead of being dependent upon them for our happiness. We then complement each other's lives instead of falling into the interdependence trap in which partners rely on each other for their individual need fulfillment.
Try this for three weeks. It sounds hokey and new age-y, but it will flip a switch on your self-worth, thus changing the direction of your relationships with others. Look in the mirror each morning and tell yourself "I love you." Give yourself a compliment or two. You may laugh, feel silly and you may even get to a point where you cry. Whatever you feel is OK. Just do it for three weeks. Watch as your inner strength rises, you find more confidence and you care less what others think of you. You come into alignment with your authentic self. People will compliment you on your outward self because they see your inner self, or soul, shining. Your love for yourself will be evident to all around you!
Just like any other practice, self-love takes dedication. Nurture, compliment and give yourself attention on a daily basis. Practice this one simple step before you try any other relationship rules, regulations or advice. And if you find things not going right in your life or relationships, remember to turn inward and love you first!
Article by Kelley Whitis
"The One Piece of Dating advice guaranteed to Work"
Writer and Founder of: Linda's Voice, A non-profit ending domestic abuse
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