Do I Really

 I'm in a funny spot, as we speak.

(aren't we all)

Sometimes, I want to finish the fight and reap all the gifts life wants to bring into my path...and they are grand, countless and seemingly priceless.

Other times, I feel like just getting to my car and disappearing into another world...new identity and All.

I have no reason to complain, because i have already been gifted a lot more than what most people can ever dream of.  But, it's not who "I" feel that I am meant to be.

Safety with certainty vs alternate life of unknowns.

Most will argue that safe equals smart.

Yesterday, I had hoped...really, really hoped for a defining moment of timing in my life to help support this walk that we all have to endure.  I needed luck, and luck did not find me.

Now, i find myself frustrated with disappointment.  What should be is not happening, and i am getting fed up with the Greed and nonsense that plagues this world.

How

Dare

They

if only the world was flat

if only this world was governed through fairness

if only good comes to us all

Instead

We are challenged to the brink of destruction, and then the world takes a step back and watches how we cope with our troubles.  It's in darkness that our shine helps us see.

Which brings,

This, My...OUR world being this spinning rock hurling through this vacuum that we call space...

Ruled by those who know survival at all cost, by any means necessary.

Good, Bad, Ugly and indifferent....

You either adapt to survive or be feasted upon by the hungry vultures surrounding us all.

s o

We make a God

Because we fear an end that we call death

and Because we need a sense of order amongst all this chaos

We conform because we have safety in numbers

why are we here?

To survive and protect our breed...ensuring the next generation takes the next step.

h a r s h

No One Pretends to care, because its about winning at all costs.  You need to protect yourself first and foremost

What If Enlightenment to a Higher Conscious were to become our End Game?

I boast a reality that I can Only See, and I do what I can to Share

because we all are here to screw it up, so we can then figure it all out

some of us get it, some of us can't

some of us might, some of us almost

while the rest have no shot other than to just be

good, bad, ugly or indifferent

My two cents of a rant that just happened to be

just like we all are now, being

Just or Not

Socially Emotional

 I find the Water's v a s t n e s s

Calm

Serene

and

Peaceful

(enticing)

For it's seducing my mind

to enter it's Abyss

of Eternity

...

But in its

Bliss

I'll miss

The Sunshine that spawned my soul

the priceless gift that i hold

Near and Dear

with all my tears and sorrow

Pain lets me know

that this is no illusion

nor does it hold False Hopes

from there, I derive the strength to rise

and

Fight through

my own battlefield

of Pleasure to Torture

...a truly personalized Hell

This is my dream, my walk

and I insist on going until i can't no more

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

As for, they are our windows

To a realm beyond comprehension

A place of peace and solace

For I dream further than the stones of my confine

The boundaries of my flesh

The very gates of my prison

I swim In an endless conscious

Of want and desire

Where hath has no fear

Just love with no lost sorrow

A galaxy of dimensions

Infinite pleasures

These walls can not hold me

For my immaculate expression

Is omnipresent

and my mind can exist 

In a land of forever

One Mind between Two I's

You need to learn to control your thoughts and in turn gain a better grasp on your mind, mood and behavior.
Why try and control things around you if you can not control what's inside of you?

Learn
         to Control
                         your Mind
                                         and Reality
                                                           will Follow

Sadhguru Says, I do Concur

"If your idea of trust in others is if they behave in a manner that you expect...that is not trusting, that's cunning."
Rather learn to trust your behavior in the wake of any and all uncertainty.

"The mind is a very powerful instrument,

Every thought,

and emotion

that you create

changes

The very Chemistry

of YOUR Body."

"If you learn to create the right climate in your body, mind and emotion...
your health, well being and joy will be well taken care of."
We make our own peace and happiness, we do not find it outside of our existance.

"Anger, resentment and hatred are poisons that one drinks and expects somebody else to die.  Life does not work like that."
Anger, resentment, hatred and jealousy are self inflicted traumas that only afflict the host and taint the  immediate landscape.

"No Work is stressful. It is your inability to manage your mind, body and emotions that make anything stressful."
We are our own reality.

"Don't be Dead Serious about your life, it just a play."
Hence why you should live each day with a smile and the knowledge that's it's your greatest gift.

Here's My Too Cents On a Penny Thought

Have you ever felt as if nothing has been going right for you?
(especially at this very moment in time???)

Well, that's exactly how I am feeling right about now.
All seems to be crumbling around me, and I can not seem to stop any of it.
This epidemic is completely upending everything around me.  This world I live in seems to be burning itself from the inside out, and everyone seems to hate and distrust anything and anybody that seems to be different from what they deem as normal or acceptable.
Financially, I am senselessly sinking a slow death contrary to what should logically be happening.  Thus instigating a needless angst in my otherwise historically calm and serene life.

Then...I try my hardest to remind myself of how lucky I am with my strong health, my quality of life, a family that loves me and friends that would do anything for me.  Plus...I am a well educated, fit, tall and handsome man.  I have plenty to be thankful and grateful for.
Yet, my world is unraveling in this rhythmic tune...and I am unable to reverse this inevitable collapse.

I am waiting to awake from this nightmare that we are ALL stuck in...sitting on the sidelines and constantly watching the depths of humanity dictating day to day life.  I'm not the type to preach about religious virtues (primarily because I see virtues irrelevant of religion, but more so an obligation to humanity)...but our sins are the root cause to all this rebel rousing that has bequeath our daily lives.  That is a direct shot at what the human Ego is responsible for.

Change is necessary, otherwise we are going to wipe ourselves from earth's history.

Lemonade

Same creatures share false shadows
Life's lesson harden our essence
Thoughtless actions, hateful words
Bitter minds taint lost souls
Vengeful eyes assault our light
Darken the path we stand to walk
Eroded respect manipulates integrity
Losing all trust of the host and road ahead
You wait for that moment where 
pleasure
and
pain
Collide
and hope
For love to prevail
but know that in your heart
That your path is no longer
The destiny that once was
or
Will ever be...

We work in simple miracles to learn things the hard way, unfortunately trust is a must
and once it's lost, it's lost forever