Government Corruption

You can't fix stupid, I'm sorry...you CAN'T
http://www.forbes.com/sites/jayadkisson/2012/07/30/you-cant-fix-stupid-the-iraqi-dinar-scam-lives/?fb_action_ids=10152055410824444&fb_action_types=forbessocial%3Acomment&fb_source=other_multiline&action_object_map=%5B10151057541222410%5D&action_type_map=%5B%22forbessocial%3Acomment%22%5D&action_ref_map=%5B%5D

Also....
http://tinyurl.com/oq2bmeh

A
True
WTF Moment:
Nine Trillion Dollars
$,$$$,$$$,$$$,$$$.$$
Missing from the Fedral Reserve....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1QK4bblyfsc


Zeitgeist Addendum
(Full Length Film)
Watch It
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3X4hwQzTTL4

Kill them with Kindness

http://shimmergoddess.hubpages.com/hub/How-to-Kill-them-with-Kindness

Monk Fruit

http://www.thekitchn.com/monk-fruit-sweetener-ingredient-spotlight-186887

How Well do you know your Anatomy?

Last month, knee surgeons from the University Hospitals Leuven in Belgium announced that they had found a new knee ligament, one that had not previously been specifically identified despite untold numbers of past knee dissections and scans. This surprising announcement, in The Journal of Anatomy, should improve our understanding of how the knee works and why some knee surgeries disappoint and also underscores the continually astonishing complexity of human anatomy.

To find and characterize this new knee part, the orthopedic surgeons Dr. Steven Claes and Dr. Johann Bellemans and their colleagues gathered 41 knee joints from human cadavers and began minutely dissecting them.

The knee, as those of us who own and operate a pair know, is complicated and somewhat fragile, an intricate construction of bones, cartilage, fluids, ligaments (which attach bones to bones) and tendons (which attach muscles to bones). Ideally, the various parts move together smoothly, but they can tear, rupture or fracture if the knee abruptly twists or overpivots. Knee injuries and pain drive millions of people to doctors every year and result in millions of knee exams, scans and surgeries.

The Journal of AnatomyThe newly identified anterolateral ligament (A.L.L.) stabilizes the knee, researchers say, but can be easily injured, contributing to knee problems.

So most of us probably have assumed that the entire internal structure of the knee has been fully mapped and delineated.

But knee specialists themselves have long been less sanguine. As far back as 1879, a French surgeon named Paul Segond first speculated that, in addition to the four obvious structural knee ligaments known then — the anterior cruciate, medial collateral, posterior cruciate and lateral collateral, which loop around and through the joint — other ligaments must exist in the knee or it would not be stable. He wrote that during dissections he had noticed a “pearly, resistant fibrous band” originating at the outside, front portion of the thighbone and continuing to the shinbone, which, in his estimation, must stabilize the outer part of the knee, preventing it from collapsing inward.

He did not, however, give this pearly band a name and somehow, in the decades that followed, its existence was forgotten or ignored. While some surgeons noted that a ligament seemed to exist there, none named and systematically studied it, and many came to consider it a continuation of other tissues, such as the nearby iliotibial band.

But a few years ago, Dr. Claes and his colleagues began to suspect otherwise. Their interest had been piqued by a problem that occurred in some patients who had undergone reconstructive surgery for an injured anterior cruciate ligament, or A.C.L. Despite the repaired knees’ appearing afterward to be healthy, the joint would sometimes give way as people moved.

“We thought, something is still not right” in that knee, said Dr. Claes, who wondered whether additional, untended knee injuries might be to blame, and if so, whether they were occurring in uncharted knee parts. “I know it probably sounds crazy to say that we thought there might be this new ligament,” he said.

But, like Dr. Segond so long before him, Dr. Claes became convinced that such a tissue must exist. Positioned at the front of the knee, it would be vulnerable to tearing when an A.C.L. was injured; the same forces would move through both ligaments. But, unlike torn A.C.L’s, this new tissue’s injuries would remain untreated, potentially leading, Dr. Claes considered, to knee instability and buckling.

So, knowing it should be there, he and his colleagues began to search for this chimerical ligament in the 41 donated knees. And there it was, a narrow band of tissue, clearly separate from the illiotibial band and neatly linking the femur and the tibia. Because it was located on the outside, front portion of the knee, they named it the anterolateral ligament, or A.L.L.

They subsequently identified, measured and scanned the A.L.L. in all but one of the donated knees, and even in that final knee, Dr. Claes said, he suspects there may once have been an A.L.L, but it possibly ruptured and withered at some point.

Whether a similar process occurs in living people who injure and don’t treat an A.L.L. — because they don’t know they have one — is unknown, Dr. Claes said, but is potentially the weightiest question raised by this new research. “We think that it’s quite likely many people who tear an A.C.L. also tear an A.L.L,” he said, and that lingering injury or weakness in this overlooked ligament could leave joints unstable.

But at the moment, that possibility is speculative, although Dr. Claes said that he and his colleagues had re-examined scans of some of the knees that they had operated on to repair A.C.L. injuries and identified concomitant A.L.L. tears in many of them.

He and his colleagues have begun planning and practicing surgical procedures for treating A.L.L. tears, but at the moment, so much remains unknown about the ligament, including whether it can heal without surgery.

“We still have a lot of work to do,” said Dr. Claes, who, with his colleagues, will be presenting continuing results at orthopedic surgery conventions in the coming months. But the fact that the A.L.L is now recognized is already “an important step forward,” he said, in understanding and potentially treating injured knees, at least in those parts of which, to date, we are aware.

Article by GretchenReynolds
"Doctors Discover New Knee Ligament"
New York Times

Growing Body Parts

Mary Shelley would be so proud!

Things in Dr. Anthony Atala's lab at Wake Forest University are not always what they seem. On one lab bench, surrounded by gutted printer cartridges, lie the inner workings of an inkjet printer. But this isn't the scene of some document-printing job gone awry. Instead, the printer has been jury-rigged to handle something much more extraordinary than ink — it now sprays tiny living cells into the three-dimensional forms of human organs.

And that's not all. Behind ordinary-looking incubator doors lie some of the most remarkable feats of modern science — pulsing blood vessels, beating heart valves, and delicate, swollen human bladders. For nearly two decades, Atala has been perfecting the science of regenerating human tissues — essentially, the science of building new body parts. "The concept is to use the body's own cells to make new tissues and organs for patients who need them," he says. "We have had so many advances in various fields of science — cell biology, materials science, and stem cell biology — and all of them are coming together now to allow us to go one step further in the field of regenerative medicine, and to start to think of creating more complex organs to help patients."

In recent years, the curative promises of embryonic stem cells and therapeutic cloning methods have outshone other research, but these techniques are still too new and unproven to yield safe and effective treatments for patients. Atala's strategy has been to use already existing cells to create more practical solutions — for replacing everything from diseased heart muscle to worn out cartilage and failing kidney cells. "Every cell in your body is programmed to do a job, and our job is to put these cells in the right environment in the lab so they know what to do," he says. "To us, it doesn't matter where the cell comes from — whether it's a bladder cell or a blood cell or an adult stem cell — we use whatever cell gets the job done."

In most cases, that cell comes right from whatever organ is ailing, and, in the ultimate feat of personalized medicine, from the ailing organ of the patient himself. Furthest along in development are regenerated human bladders, which are already being tested in early human trials and which Atala has thoughtfully designed in small, medium and large sizes. Not far behind on the organ assembly line are heart valves and blood vessels. Atala began with the bladder not only because of his training as a pediatric urologist, but also because bladder cells are among the many that can be grown outside of the body. In fact, he says, just about every human cell can now be cultured in a Petri dish — something that wasn't true 20 years ago, when Atala began his regeneration research. The only exceptions are pancreas, liver and nerve cells; so far these have proven too finicky to survive outside their human home.

It takes Atala about six weeks to grow a new body part. The key to his success and speed, he says, is his reliance on a patient's own cells whenever possible. "We take a small piece of tissue from the diseased organ, grow up a bunch of normal cells, manipulate them and put them right back into the same patient," he says. "Because we are not using cells from other people, we avoid all issues with rejection." For the patient, that also means a shorter and more comfortable recovery, and a better chance of having the regenerated organ "take."

Creating a working organ hinges on keeping those first few cells alive, which has proven to be the biggest challenge for Atala's team. Each cell — whether from the bladder, skin, cartilage, or heart — prefers a different environment to grow, made up of unique cocktails of growth factors, enzymes, proteins and other nutrients. Once the incubated cells have multiplied to a sufficient number, Atala puts them through a series of rigorous tests to ensure that they look, act and function just like their normally grown siblings in the body.

And that's when the fun starts. In order to mold human organs from a clump of cells, Atala came up with creatively constructed scaffolds that would guide the newly grown cells into shape. In most cases — for the bladder, blood vessels and valves, for example — he uses a biodegradable material made of collagen, the structural component in skin. But in order to create more complex structures, such as the heart, he needed something far more sophisticated as a matrix. That's where the inkjet printer came in. One of Atala's colleagues had the bright idea that if a printer can spray tiny bits of ink in a pre-set pattern, why couldn't that same technique be used to scatter cells into pre-designed templates? So, instead of printing in one dimension, Atala's expert re-tooled the printer to "print" its cells in successive layers; the end result is a three-dimensional mold of cells that looks suspiciously like, for example, a rudimentary heart.

Earlier this year, Atala's group became the first to make another valuable discovery: that amniotic fluid contains stem cells. These have proven critical in helping his team to regenerate tissues from the more ornery cells of the pancreas, liver and nerves, which don't grow as well in a lab dish. Amniotic-fluid stem cells aren't as versatile as embryonic stem cells, which can turn into every tissue type in the body, but they can still develop into an impressive number of much-needed cell types, and Atala has already used them to grow up muscle, bone, fat and blood vessel cells, in addition to nerve and liver. He thinks that amniotic-fluid stem cells could eventually be banked, like blood cells, for universal access by any patient who might need regenerated organs. He predicts that if only about 100,000 specimens were collected from the 4 million live births each year in the U.S., it would be enough to supply 99% of Americans with appropriately matched tissues.

The first patients to receive Atala's regenerated organs were seven young children who were transplanted with bladders grown from their own cells. Eight years after their surgery, the children are doing well, and their bladders continue to function normally. Atala now has about 20 other tissues and organs in his lab almost ready for human trials, but he refuses to rush the technology. "Our goal is to transfer these technologies from bench to bedside in the fastest way possible," he says, "But we have gone slowly in these trials because we wanted to make sure that the tissues and organs we create are safe and effective long-term." That kind of patience is sure to be rewarded.


Article by Alice Park
: "The Science of Growing Body Parts" - TIME

Starving Cancer with a Ketogenic Diet

http://www.cbn.com/cbnnews/healthscience/2012/december/starving-cancer-ketogenic-diet-a-key-to-recovery/

Meet my Pimp

This world of ours has One kind of dynamic...
That dynamic between a "Whore" and 'The Pimp'
A world that sells its very spirit for the opportunity to walk along 'the gold plated road' enroute to an undisclosed, yet ever so sought after paradise.
Welcome to your world and mine...

I thrive in the same shamefully vast prison...
Low on morals, corrupt to its very core.

B
E
T
R
A
Y
E
D

by an undelivered promise...
A misguiding ideal
explained by a drunk, on the very same street cornered your father bought your mother
And
sold principles to a banker that ran off with all your wealth...and mine...

H U S H
begone!!!

This.  My World.  Which soiled 'this' and 'that'
Has given rise to a chore I so gladly charm.
Ho-hum....
My God?!  It's all Gone?
Where? There?  No Here, which is very far from there.
They lied to me, just as much as they have lied to you!
Forgive me if I have misspoken, I am shamed by my rawness....
My World,
Dark, Grim....yet so delightful...
Filled with joy, decorated by pain....
My world, my life...
One in which I share....with anyone willing to listen...

No place I would rather exist in. It's infinite in its possibilities, yet definitive in eliciting responses. Vivid in excitement and creativity, yet At times, dormant with an unrelenting rudeness. It shapes and defines me, my world, my tastes...and my disguises...it's elaborate in its planning, but, simple in its explanations. Our world, with or without a pimp, it's a world many take note of.




My blood carries the same color as yours....

Shallow

What is shallow? Who's shallow? How shallow is shallow?
To each their own.
In most issues, I am anything but.

Shallow is a negative due to the inevitable propulsion away from the core.

I prefer one to mingle in the outer shell for a refractory period...before being invited into deeper segments...
And Once one has proven themselves worthy...
They can meet the center force that drives....

Shallow lacks depth and substance...
The building blocks of any true standing individual.
Shallow lacks stability, often tumbling in the face of conflict.
Shallow includes simple and silly...which often time finds a way to erase.
Shallow betrays, enough those that it loves.
Shallow irks the thoughtful quiet places that some dwell.
Shallow drains the soul.
Shallow is a plague best eradicated...

Shallow has no place in my world,
My soul,
My aura of intention...
My avenue of inspiration.

This is my life,
One that roots through time and extends well beyond the heavens.

Chaos

My Favorite...
Well, ONE of MY Favorite words....

When pleasure and chaos collide...all hell breaks loose!

Just ask this guy, his girlfriend and the Brazilian Stripper!!

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=mkovlI_opFY&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DmkovlI_opFY

Hard Falls

Rise above the backdrop of heartache
Grab hold...with both fists
and
Never let go....
Of your brewing passions,
Of those feisty moments.... when faced with conflict
Lift, lift above those drowning moments
Feel...feel united with all your forbidden temptations
Cry...cry with emotion, when a tear best suits that evocation
Rejoice, with compassion
Embrace all incoming connections
Mend your open wounds
With attentive tenderness
and
Inspiring sweetness
Welcome to a flight,
Rising out of your dark realm
and joining mine
Fruitful and seductive
Let me entrance you
This walk is worth your time

What Relationship Couple Type are You?

According to Adam Grant, Wharton's most popular and youngest tenured faculty member and the author of Give and Take: A Revolutionary Approach to Success, people fall into one of three distinct categories: givers, matchers and takers. While Grant's book is written for a business audience, its theories provide extraordinary insight into romantic relationships. The category you fall into may well determine the success and happiness of your relationship.

For example, has a romantic relationship ever made you feel like you were not good enough? Have you ever been taken advantage of by a romantic partner? Have you ever felt like you gave everything to someone and ended up completely worn out? Then you may just fall into the "giver" style of romantic partner.

Interestingly, while the giver style may have its drawbacks, givers are also usually the most attractive partners and are more likely to have long-term relationships. A study examining the trait most highly valued in potential romantic partners suggests that both men and women rate kindness as one of their most desired traits. Givers are also most likely to be affectionate, a trait which determines the long-term success of a relationship (as I describe in this article), not to mention their own longevity.

In order to understand where you fit in and how to best navigate your relationships with others, here's a summary of the three styles of romantic partners.

Givers are people whose primary motivation is to take care of others, to make sure others are well, and to contribute to others and society. In a relationship, these are people who are always thinking about gifts for their partner, who take their partners' interests into consideration, and who are always thinking, "What else can I do for you?" They're pretty awesome. As Grant mentions in his book, everyone likes having givers around because they are always happy to contribute and thinking of others. They understand the relationship as an opportunity to give and take care.

Givers often end up thinking that there is something wrong with them when they are unhappy in a relationship. They are the ones who think they are not lovable or good enough because they take personal responsibility for making the relationship work (rather than blaming their partners). They can end up burned out and exhausted from continuously giving if they do not receive the support they need from the relationship.

Matchers tend to keep a balance sheet in a relationship. When matchers give, they do so with an expectation of getting something in return. When they receive something, they feel like they have to give something back. Matchers are the ones who are keeping tabs and view relationships as somewhat like a commercial transaction. They are the ones who are most likely to say something like, "I did this for you, but you didn't do that for me" or "You paid for this, so I'll pay for that."

Takers are just that -- takers. They usually treat people well if and when those people can help them reach their goals. Interestingly, Grant points out that they often appear as the most charming and charismatic people on the surface. They know how to work the crowd and seduce, but under the surface they are actually motivated by self-interest. You can recognize a taker by how poorly they treat people that they believe are of no use to them. You know you're in a relationship with a taker when you feel sucked dry for all you have, whether it's money, affection, time etc. Once the taker has everything they want from you, you may be relegated to the unimportant sphere of their life. Their primary focus is themselves.

So who is most successful and who is least successful?

Grant points out a fascinating fact about who, among these three styles, is happiest and most successful: it is givers. What about those who are least successful? Also the givers! Why? Givers who learn to successfully navigate a world with matchers and takers make out great. Everyone loves givers, trusts them, and supports them when they are in need. So why are givers also the least successful? Because some givers don't know how to navigate that world and, as a consequence, end up getting taken advantage of. If you're a giver, you've been there at least once both professionally and personally.

Imagine a relationship between a giver and a taker? These end up with the giver completely worn out, having perhaps spent their savings, time and energy on someone who keeps demanding more and never or scarcely provides for their partners' needs (unless they do so temporarily because it behooves them at that moment).

What makes a successful giver? Read Adam Grant's book to get his complete lists of tips. One that stood out to me was the idea of being a "giver with awareness." Awareness of what? Be aware that the world has givers, matchers and takers. Watch people's words and actions and you will know who is who. When you navigate romantic relationships, friendships or business partnerships, investigate which category your potential partner belongs to and don't get blown away by first-impressions (as noted above, takers are masters of first-impression charm). Then what? In a non-romantic situation, you can deal with matchers and takers by adopting a matcher-like attitude (I know, hard to do for a giver!). Start speaking in terms of, "Ok, we have an agreement, you do this and in exchange I will do this."

What about in romantic relationships? I conferred with Adam Grant while writing this article and he shared the following tip about long-term love: "In the most successful relationships, both partners are givers. In other words, when a romantic relationship works, matchers and takers are focused on giving. Both partners might be giving in different ways, but they should be willing to support each other without expecting something in return. That said, when things get too far out of balance, I think we all become matchers." Imagine a relationship where both partners are always caring for each other's needs. Where when there is a fight, both are the first to say, "I'm sorry, it was my fault." In which both live their life with their partner's best interest in mind. You better believe that matchers and takers are also looking out for givers so, if you're a giver, be sure you seek one out for yourself too because you deserve it.

If you recognize yourself as a matcher or taker then -- first of all -- congratulations on being so honest with yourself. Of course, because of givers' affectionate and service-oriented qualities, it is also in your best interest to have a partner who is a giver. However, I'd like you to consider two things:

First, givers will never be fully happy unless you support them as they support you. They will eventually feel worn out and perhaps even leave. In a recent study by Amie Gordon at the University of California-Berkeley, those who experienced more gratitude in their relationship also felt closer to their partner, more satisfied with the relationship and tended to engage in more constructive and positive behaviors within the relationship. Ultimately, for a good relationship that benefits you, you will want your partner to be happy and you'll want to support them in return.

Second, as Grant's book clearly outlines, givers are the ones who end up being most successful and happy if they are not taken advantage of. A large amount of research now shows that a lifestyle comprised of kindness and service leads to greater fulfillment as well as health and happiness. If you want to be happy and successful, it therefore behooves you too to be or become a giver.

With the Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays coming up, it's a great time to start being a giver! After all, isn't that what love is about?



Article by Emma Seppala, Ph.D. 

Kissing Snakes

Your bright moon fades beyond my horizon,
Vanishing...
Without Warning
Like a pendulum, hiding on the other side
Where the cool shade, fogs my path
Chills run down my spine
Frost coats my face, in the dark
All alone
Lost in space
....
Gone
Like an amber mist
In a dormant fireplace
Tossed, in a time
Where warmth ran its course
and the world quietly sat around
Sharing stories and keeping cozy
Remember...how the nightmare use to be?

Tell me No lies

My dearest femme,
Had a century of time and space not wedge itself
In between our colliding paths
Our wielding ways
Would serve the platform
Of our first date
And,
If luck should fiddle you right
and satisfaction coated your heart
Your mind
and your soul
Just maybe, your luck would change
And our first date...sets the table for a second...
The moon shall share it's grin
And light our path into our third...
By this point,
You'll either be smitten by a curious mystery
Or burdened into uncanny and  unsavory company...
Either way,
Always make it your choice...
Choose with conviction,
Use logic and passion to determine
The difference
Between
Lust and Fate
Your life, is linear....in time you'll find a raggedy counterpart
That will make all your warts gleam with beauty
And shine with effervescence....
Let your current worries...become a forgotten past
Think of a journey....that you are about to embark upon
Ask,
Ask me...how beautiful you are...
And I respond,
The prettiest my eyes have ever seen....

Boring Men, how Romantic

So not every guy proposes with lip syncing, rolling cameras, and a choreographed entourage.

Yeah -- so what if your dad didn't?

He just pulled that beat-up Volkswagon Rabbit of his over in front of Murray Reesor's hundred acre farm right there where Grey Township meets Elma Township, pulled out a little red velvet box, and whispered it in the snowy dark: "Marry me?"

"He didn't even get down on one knee or anything?"

You boys ask it incredulously, like there's some kind of manual for this kind of holy.

And I've got no qualms in telling you no. No, he didn't even get down on one knee -- it was just a box, a glint of gold in the dark, two hallowed words and a question mark.

"Boring."

I know. When you've watched a few dozen mastermind proposals on youtube, shared them with their rolling credits on Facebook, marveling at how real romance has an imagination like that.

Can I tell you something, sons?

Romance isn't measured by how viral your proposal goes. The Internet age may try to sell you something different, but don't ever forget that viral is closely associated with sickness -- so don't ever make being viral your goal.

Your goal is always to make your Christ-focus contagious -- to just one person.

It's more than just imagining some romantic proposal.

It's a man who imagines washing puked-on sheets at 2:30 a.m., plunging out a full and plugged toilet for the third time this week, and then scraping out the crud in the bottom screen of the dishwasher -- every single night for the next 37 years without any cameras rolling or soundtrack playing -- that's imagining true romance.

The man who imagines slipping his arm around his wife's soft, thickening middle age waistline and whispering that he couldn't love her more.... who imagines the manliness of standing bold and unashamed in the express checkout line with only maxi pads and tampons because someone he loves is having an unexpected Saturday morning emergency.

The man who imagines the coming decades of a fluid life -- her leaking milky circles through a dress at Aunt Ruth's birthday party, her wearing thick diaper-like Depends for soggy weeks after pushing a whole human being out through her inch-wide cervix, her bleeding through sheets and gushing amniotic oceans across the bathroom floor and the unexpected beauty of her crossing her legs every time she jumps on the trampoline with the kids.

The real romantics imagine greying and sagging and wrinkling as the deepening of something sacred.

Because get this, kids -- how a man proposes isn't what makes him romantic. It's how a man purposes to lay down his life that makes him romantic.

And a man begins being romantic years before any ring -- romance begins with only having eyes for one woman now -- so you don't go giving your eyes away to cheap porn. Your dad will say it sometimes to me, a leaning over -- "I am glad that there's always only been you." Not some bare, plastic-surgeon-scalpel-enhanced pixels ballooning on a screen, not some tempting flesh clicked on in the dark, not some photo-shopped figment of cultural beauty that's basically a lie.

The real romantics know that stretch marks are beauty marks and that differently shaped women fit into the different shapes of men's souls and that real romance is really sacrifice.

I know -- you're thinking, "Boring."

Can you see it again -- how your grandfather stood over your grandmother's grave and brushed away his heart leaking without a sound down his cheeks?

Fifty boring years. Fifty unfilmed years of milking 70 cows, raising six boys and three girls, getting ready for sermon every Sunday morning, him helping her with her zipper. Fifty boring years of arguing in Dutch and making up in touching in the dark, 50 boring years of planting potatoes and weeding rows on humid July afternoons, 50 boring years of washing the white Corel dishes and turning out the light on the mess -- till he finally carried her in and out of the tub and helped her pull up her Depends.

Don't ever forget it:

The real romantics are the boring ones -- they let another heart bore a hole deep into theirs.

Be one of the boring ones. Pray to be one who get 50 boring years of marriage -- 50 years to let her heart bore a hole deep into yours.

Let everyone do their talking about 50 shades of grey, but don't let anyone talk you out of it: commitment is pretty much black and white. Because the truth is, real love will always make you suffer. Simply commit: Who am I willing to suffer for?

Who am I willing to take the reeking garbage out for and clean out the gross muck ponding at the bottom of the fridge? Who am I willing to listen to instead of talk at? Who am I willing to hold as they grow older and realer? Who am I willing to die a bit more for every day? Who am I willing to make heart-boring years with? Who am I willing to let bore a hole into my heart?

Get it: Life -- and marriage proposals -- isn't not about one-upmanship -- it's about one-downmanship. It's about the heart-boring years of sacrifice and going lower and serving. It's not about how well you perform your proposal. It's about how well you let Christ perform your life.

Sure, go ahead, have fun, make a ridiculously good memory and we'll cheer loud: propose creatively -- but never forget that what wows a woman and woos her is you how you purpose to live your life.

I'm praying, boys -- be Men. Be one of the 'boring" men -- and let your heart be bore into. And know there are women who love that kind of man.

The kind of man whose romance isn't flashy -- because love is gritty.
The kind of man whose romance isn't about cameras -- because it's about Christ.
The kind of man whose romance doesn't have to go viral -- because it's going eternal.

No, your dad did not get down on one knee when he proposed -- because the romantic men know it's about living your whole life on your knees.

There are Fridays. And the quiet romantics who will take out the garbage without fanfare. There will be the unimaginative calendar by the fridge, with all it's scribbled squares of two lives being made one. The toilet seat will be left predictably up. The sink will be resigned to its load of last night's dishes.

And there is now and the beautiful boring, the way two lives touch and go deeper into time with each other.

The clock ticking passionately into decades.




Article by Ann Voskamp
"The Real Truth About 'Boring' Men -- and the Women Who Live With Them"
Follow Ann Voskamp on Twitter: www.twitter.com/AnnVoskamp

Jason Silva's "Shots of Awe"

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Yb-OYmHVchQ&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DYb-OYmHVchQ

Bad Habits Die Hard

Boys are stupid and girls are crazy, right?
Maybe some, never state definitive statements....there are always exemptions!
Right, Emma?
Emma?
Where's Emma?


It is conventional wisdom that we’re our own worst enemies and despite the cliche, the idea rings true. We often drive ourselves insane striving for perfection in our experiences, relationships and selves, and honestly it just becomes exhausting. So here at HuffPost Women we’re issuing a challenge to ourselves -- and other women -- to stop doing these 23 things. (Of course it’s all easier said than done, but to employ another cliche, if at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.)

1. Apologizing all the time. Research has shown that women actually do say “sorry” more often than men. We’re all for taking responsibility when you make a mistake -- but constantly apologizing for having your waiter split the check or asking a date to hang out on a different night or telling a friend about your problems, does more harm than good. There’s no need to qualify everything you do. Own your preferences and decisions.

2. Saying “yes” to everyone else. Yes, I will meet you for coffee even though I’m exhausted and just want to go home and crawl into bed. Yes, I will edit your resume even though I’m swamped with my own work. Yes, I will go on a double date with you, your almost-boyfriend and his awful friend who’s in town. Stop saying “yes” when you don’t truly mean it. People actually respect you more when you set boundaries.

3. Saying “no” to yourself. A lot of women spend a whole lot of time deciding what we can’t do or shouldn’t do or aren’t good enough to do. Don’t allow your insecurities and anxieties to make your decisions for you -- you’ll only end up missing out on worthwhile experiences. So go talk to that group of people you think you won’t fit in with, stay out late against your better judgment every once in awhile and treat yourself to that blowout even if you don’t really need it.

4. Viewing food as the enemy. Women often receive the message that our ultimate worth lies in our looks. Our hair should be smoothed or perfectly curled, our makeup on at all times -- but natural-looking -- and our bodies bangin’ (read: thin). In the quest to achieve these impossible standards, it’s easy to see food as something to contend with rather than to enjoy. Be cognizant of what you put in your body -- after all, it’s the only one you have -- but try to do away with the guilt. Savor every bite of that gnocchi with gorgonzola or that Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream or those fresh cherry tomatoes. Food should not come with regrets. As Nora Ephron wrote, “I have made a lot of mistakes falling in love, and regretted most of them, but never the potatoes that went with them.”

5. Body-snarking -- out loud or in your own head. Stop putting your looks down, period. Nothing good will ever come of it, unless you’re working through body issues with your therapist.

6. Feeling like an impostor when you accomplish something professionally. Women are more likely than men to feel like “impostors” at work, often doubting whether we deserve the successes we achieve. Start taking your accomplishments at face value. You got that new job or promotion or grade or public recognition because you were worthy of it.

7. Obsessively untagging every “unflattering” photo of you that ever existed online. While it makes sense that you don’t want that photo of you blinking showing up all over your Facebook profile, we probably cause ourselves more anxiety than necessary making sure every image that doesn’t show us in perfect lighting doing something totally amazing goes away. It’s not only just one more way for us to obsess about our looks -- after all, people will post what they’ll post and we have little control -- but online photo albums have largely replaced physical ones. You may not want to remember the unflattering face you made at your brother’s graduation party now, but down the line you might want to conjure the moment.

8. Comparing your real life to someone else’s virtual one. Spending a ton of time obsessing over your own online life can be anxiety-provoking -- but so can obsessing over other peoples’ virtual personas. Research has shown that Facebook addiction is correlated with lower self-esteem. And who wouldn’t feel bad sitting in bed on a Monday night scrolling through your ex’s vacation photo album or the enthusiastic statuses your friend in the fashion industry posted during a celeb-filled party? Instead of playing a constant game of comparison, which studies have shown can actually magnify feelings of depression, just close your laptop and enjoy the present. At least it’s real.

9. Holding on to regrets and guilt. “I’m pretty anti-regret,” Lena Dunham said at the 2012 New Yorker Festival. Guilt and regret are two emotions that usually serve to torture the person feeling them. Acknowledge your regrets and guilts, and then move on to the best of your ability.

10. Wearing heels every day. Look at this terrifying infographic and then tell me why it’s a good idea to force your poor feet into stilettos on a daily basis. We love a gorgeous pair of pumps, but embracing comfort (most of the time) will not only make your commute a whole lot more pleasant, but your feet a whole lot happier for years to come. Plus, flat shoes can be super stylish.

11. Judging other women’s sex lives. No woman deserves to be put down for who she sleeps with, how many people she sleeps with or how she chooses to express her sexuality. Next time you’re about to call another woman a “prude” or a “slut” just zip your lips. Even Miley Cyrus and her twerking shouldn’t be slut-shamed.

12. Judging your own sex life. No one needs to know your “number.” And honestly, you probably care a whole lot more about what the sex you’re having (or not having) supposedly says about you than anyone else does.

13. Trying to be “chill.” Maybe you truly are the “cool girl” who loves nothing more than kicking back with a six-pack and a movie. But for those of us who don’t possess the “chill” gene, let’s stop trying. Striving to be the mellow girl at all times keeps us from expressing our needs, desires and opinions.

14. Fearing the label “crazy.” There is no easier way to discredit a woman’s opinion or feelings than to accuse her of being overly emotional. “I don't think this idea that women are ‘crazy,’ is based in some sort of massive conspiracy,” wrote author Yashar Ali in a blog for The Huffington Post in 2011. “Rather, I believe it's connected to the slow and steady drumbeat of women being undermined and dismissed, on a daily basis.” Being scared of the label only encourages women to silence themselves. Plus, everyone has a little bit of crazy inside of them -- regardless of gender.

15. WebMD-ing everything. Your glands may have been swollen for a week but it does not automatically mean that you have a massive tumor in your neck. Step away from the Internet doctor and go see a real one if you’re truly worried.

16. Worrying that your life doesn’t look like Pinterest. You are not Martha Stewart. You will probably never make that DIY floating bookshelf. And your Eggocado will never look as delicious as this one does.

17. Fearing being alone. There are certain things you have control over -- like trying to go on dates, and actively meeting new people -- and others which you simply don’t. Finding a life partner (or even a temporary one) is one of those things. You can’t pinpoint when or where or how you’ll meet someone to spend your life with, so stop freaking yourself out over the idea that you never will. And there are far worse things than being alone. “The most profound relationship we'll ever have is the one with ourselves,” Shirley MacLaine once said. Preach.

18. Being in relationships for the sake of having a relationship. If you’re terrified of being alone, the worst thing you can do is jump into a relationship you don’t really want. Nothing good comes from tying yourself to a person who isn’t right for you simply because you feel the need to couple up. As Nora Ephron wrote when she launched HuffPost Divorce: “Marriages come and go, but divorce is forever.”

19. Not taking advantage of your vacation days. More Americans than ever are forgoing their (already meager) paid vacation days -- despite the fact that we know that people who take time off are more likely to be healthy, happy and productive workers. We swear, no one will die if you turn off your cell phone and head to the mountains for a long weekend.



20. Holding on to toxic friendships. Banish any Regina George-like frenemies from your life ASAP. Life is too short to waste time with people who make you feel like crap.

21. Spending time with people out of obligation. Just because you spent every waking moment of your elementary school days with someone doesn’t mean you have anything in common with her now. There’s no need to see every old friend and third cousin who passes through your city. Be intentional about who you spend your time with and allow yourself to let some relationships fade away naturally.

22. Being embarrassed about your interests. “I want to be a f**king feminist and wear a f**king Peter Pan collar. So f**king what?,” said Zooey Deschanel in Glamour magazine’s February 2013 issue. Take a cue from the actress and stop caring what you “should” look like/care about/talk about. If you love girly things, love girly things. If you don’t, don’t. Embrace your lack of knowledge about music, your hockey obsession and your weakness for both “Breaking Bad” and “The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.” And if there’s a particular subject area you don’t know about but you encounter someone who does? Take the opportunity to ask questions.

23. Setting deadlines for major life events. Don’t try to meticulously plan out when you should find love or have babies or get that dream job or buy that amazing brownstone. Enjoy the uncertainty of life and allow yourself to be overjoyed when you hit those milestones or pleasantly surprised when you realize you want to skip out on some of them altogether.



Article by Emma Gray
"23 Things Every Woman Should Stop Doing"

Yell Much?

I'm not a yeller, it's just not in my genetic make up.
Personally, I find people that yell:
Obnoxious, rude, inconsiderate (as to what the harm of their words do), unnecessary, uncivil, undiplomatic and non-constructive.
It's to say, right?
Especially by me....someone who has no concept on what inspires yelling and how yelling helps cope with specific situations...right?
Not everyone can be the cool, calm and collective type...as I am, right?
Lets ask The Orange Rhino....



January 20, 2012. I will never forget that date. Thinking I was home alone with my four boys, then ages 5 and under, my handyman caught me in a full on, red in the face, body shaking, throat throbbing scream so bad that all my boys burst into tears. I was mortified. Mortified! And so sad; this was not the mom I had ever dreamed I would be! The next day I decided enough was enough and I promised my boys I would go 365 days straight without yelling. Soon thereafter I discovered that rhinos are calm animals that charge when provoked; I was so a rhino (I even have lots of stretch marks and saggy body parts to prove it.) I just charged with my words instead of a horn. I quickly started calling myself The Orange Rhino as a reminder to no longer yell, but instead to be calm like a rhino and warm like the color orange.

I proudly share that I am officially an Orange Rhino! I haven't charged with my words in over 400 days thanks to many things I learned this past year. Here are the top 10 things that I learned but trust me, there are many many more!

1. Yelling isn't the only thing I haven't done in over a year.

I also haven't gone to bed with a gut-wrenching pit in my stomach because I felt like the worst mom ever. I haven't bawled to my husband that I yelled again and again. And I haven't heard my sons scream, "You're the meanest, worstest, mommy in the whole world, I don't love you anymore!"

2. My kids are my most important audience.

When I had my "no more yelling epiphany," I realized that I don't yell in the presence of others because I want them to believe I am a loving and patient mom. The truth is, I already was that way... but rarely when I was alone, just always when I was in public with an audience to judge me. This is so backwards! I always have an audience -- my four boys are always watching me and THEY are the audience that matters most; they are the ones I want to show just how loving, patient and "yell-free" I can be. I want my boys to judge me and proclaim, "My mommy is the bestest mommy ever!" I remember this whenever I am home and thinking I can't keep it together; obviously I can... I do it out and about all the time!

3. Kids are kids -- and not just kids, but people too.

Like me, my kids have good days and bad days. Some days they are pleasant and sweet and listen really well; other days they are grumpy and difficult. By the way, I am always sweet and never difficult. Always. Ha! And like all kids, my boys are loud at times, they refuse to put their shoes on, and they color on the wall, especially if it is covered in brand new wallpaper that mommy loves. So, yeah, I need to watch my expectations and remember that my boys are kids: they are still learning, still growing, and still figuring out how to handle waking up on the wrong side of the bed. When they "make mistakes" I need to remember that not only does yelling not help, but like me, they don't like to be yelled at!

4. I can't always control my kids' actions, but I can always control my reaction.

I can try my hardest to follow all the parenting tricks of the trade for well-disciplined children, but since my kids are just kids, they sometimes won't do what I want. I can decide if I want to scream "Pick up your Legos!" when they don't listen or if I want to walk away for a second, regain composure by doing some jumping jacks, and then return with a new approach. P.S. Walking away and taking a breather can actually get the Legos picked up faster than yelling.

5. Yelling doesn't work.

There were numerous times when I wanted to quit my Orange Rhino Challenge, when I thought yelling would just be easier than finding deep breaths and creative alternatives to yelling. But I knew better. Early on, I learned that yelling simply doesn't work, that it just makes things spiral out of control and it makes it hard for my boys to hear what I want them to learn. How can they clearly hear me "say" "Hurry up, get your backpacks, your shoes, your jackets, don't touch each other, go faster, you can do it yourself!" when it's all a garbled, loud mix of intimidating orders that are making them cry?

6. By yelling you might miss out on life-changing moments.

One night I heard footsteps coming downstairs well after bedtime. Although infuriated that my "me-time" was interrupted, I remained calm and returned said child to bed. As I tucked him in he said "Mommy, will you love me if I go to heaven first, because if you go first, I will still love you. In fact, I will always love you." Tears still come to my eyes just writing that. I can guarantee if I had yelled "GET BACK IN BED!" we never would have had that sweet, very important conversation.

7. Two words you should always remember are "at least."

I am not going to say not yelling is "easy peasy," but getting creative with alternatives certainly made it easier and more doable. And after yelling into the toilet, beating my chest like a gorilla, singing Lalala, Lalala it's Elmo's world, and using orange napkins at mealtime as a reminder of my promise, it certainly got a heck of a lot easier. Sure, I feel silly at times doing these things, but they keep me from losing it. So do my new favorite words: "at least." These two small words give me great perspective and remind me to chill out. I use them readily in any annoying but not yell worthy kid situation. "He just dropped an entire jug of milk on the floor... at least it wasn't glass and at least he was trying to help!" I also use them readily when I want to give up:"'Okay, this is hard but at least there are only three hours until bedtime, not 12."

8. Often times, I am the problem, not my kids.

The break-up line, "It's not you, it's me" rings uncomfortably true when learning not to yell. I quickly realized that oftentimes I wanted to yell because I had a fight with my husband, I was overwhelmed by my to-do list, I was tired or it was that time of the month, not because the kids were behaving "badly." I also quickly realized that acknowledging my personal triggers by saying out loud: "Orange Rhino, you have wicked PMS and need chocolate, you aren't mad at the kids, don't yell" works really well to keep yells at bay.

9. Taking care of me helps me to not yell.

I was always great at taking care of others; I was not, however, always good at taking care of myself until now. Once I realized that personal triggers like feeling overweight, feeling disconnected from friends, and feeling exhausted set me up to yell, I started taking care of me. I started going to bed earlier, prioritizing exercise, trying to call one friend a day and most importantly, I started telling myself it's OK to not be perfect. Taking care of me not only helps me not yell, but it also makes me happier, more relaxed, and more loving. Ah, the benefits of not yelling extend far beyond parenting! There is no doubt that I am in a better parenting AND personal place now that I don't yell. Just to name a few unexpected benefits of not yelling: I do more random acts of kindness, I handle stressful situations more gracefully, and I communicate more lovingly with my husband.

10. Not yelling feels phenomenal for everyone.

Now that I have stopped yelling, not only do I feel happier and calmer, I also feel lighter. I go to bed guilt-free (except for the extra cookie I ate that day, oops) and wake up more confident that I can parent with greater understanding of my kids, my needs, and how to be more loving and patient. And I am pretty sure my kids feel happier and calmer too. I know everyone wants to read, "I stopped yelling and not only do I feel great, but also my kids are now calmer AND perfectly behaved." Well, they aren't. They are still kids. But, yes tantrums are shorter and some are completely avoided. Now that I am calmer, I can think more rationally to resolve potential problems before meltdown mania. But forget perfectly behaved kids for a second. My kids are most definitely more loving towards me, and now tell me quite often "I love you Orange Rhino mommy!" and that feels more than awesome, it feels phenomenal.





Article by the orange rhino


The Orange RhinoMom to 4 young boys, former yeller, blogger at TheOrangeRhino.com

"10 Things I Learned When I Stopped Yelling at My Kids"

Every Time

I Laugh, and hope that she's watching....

Not as much to see that I am happy,

but maybe...just maybe

She would fall for my smile

Just As Hard

as I fell for hers.

The Truth Is

that Airports saw MORE sincere Kisses
Smooches bootches
Than...
(Ding Dong)
Wedding Halls!!!
AND
walls of Hospitals have heard
More Prayers
Than....
The Walls of Churches (or Temples or Mosques...)

Truth is...we just need to become more loving and more accepting of each other.
In Many Ways,
We are all brothers and sisters to one another!

Little Lulu

Everyone deserves a little Lulu in their lives!

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=wReMhOJ5f98&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DwReMhOJ5f98

Female Hysteria Decoded

"If you believe your own lies, are you lying?"  by George Costanza

I must admit it, otherwise I would not only be lying to you...I would be lying to myself!

I don't always get women!  I don't!!  Yet who really does?

Trying to decode women is similar to looking at hyroglifics...and attempting to explain all the relevance of the pyramids of Giza....

Men, don't get women.  Sorry, we just don't.  We seem stupid when we pretend to understand.  We can be comically misguided...we might even come across as So Confused...that we may not even know that there is a problem!  Forgive us, talking cars or watching football is a lot easier.  Football and cars come with a books explaining their "rules of engagement".

Female Hysteria: 7 Crazy Things People Used To Believe About The Ladies' Disease

Deeply disheartening though it may be, the practice of labeling women "crazy" is alive and well today, and its roots are deep. As in, it's-been-happening-for-thousands-of-years-and-has-been-pretty-well-tolerated-by-most-of-society deep.

Hysteria was the first mental disorder attributed to women (and only women) -- a catch-all for symptoms including, but by no means limited to: nervousness, hallucinations, emotional outbursts and various urges of the sexual variety (more on that below).

To make clear how far we've come in our understanding of women's mental health, and how far we have yet to go, here's a little trip down memory lane -- a tour of just seven of the weirdest things so-called "experts" used to believe about female hysteria. (You know, in addition to it being an actual thing that existed.)

1. Hysteria was caused by wandering wombs.

Ah, those pesky wombs -- never staying still, always stirring up problems. According to a comprehensive history of female hysteria compiled by researchers from the University of Cagliari in Italy, Egyptian texts dating as far back as 1900 BC argued that hysterical disorders were caused by women's wombs moving throughout their bodies. The ancient Greeks believed it, too. In the 5th century BC, Hippocrates (i.e., the founder of western medicine, in what may not go down as his greatest achievement) first coined the term "hysteria" -- from "hystera," or uterus -- and also attributed its cause to abnormal movements of the womb in a woman's body.

2. And experts believed the condition was incredibly common.

Thomas Sydenham was an influential British physician who lived from the mid- to late-1600s, and clearly thought that crazy ladies were wandering around everywhere.According to Mother Jones, Sydenham once declared that female hysteria -- which he attributed to "irregular motions of the animal spirits," was the second most common malady of the time, just behind fevers.

3. Sexy thoughts were a symptom.

Fainting, outbursts, nervousness and irritability weren't the only hallmarks of female hysteria; certain core aspects of female sexuality, desire and sexual frustration were also on the list. As Mother Jones reports, "excessive vaginal lubrication" and "erotic fantasy" were also both considered symptoms of the disease. The horror!

4. It could be cured by pelvic massage ...

At various points in history, the massaging of a woman's pelvis (i.e., her genitals) was embraced by many a health expert as the cure for female hysteria, resulting in "hysterical paroxysm," or orgasm. Though the practice dates back to the renaissance, and even before, it became a money-maker for the medical establishment during the Victorian era. "By the early 19th century, physician-assisted paroxysm was firmly entrenched in Europe and the U.S. and proved a financial godsend for many doctors,"Psychology Today explains.

5. ... or vibrators ...

When the vibrator emerged in the late 19th century, explains technology historian Rachel Maines [technology historian] in her book "The Technology of Orgasm" explains, it was intended as an "electromechanical medical instrument" to provide more reliable and efficient physical therapy to women believed to be suffering from hysteria. And it was a welcome advance. Doctors "sought every opportunity to substitute other devices for their fingers," Maines writes.

6. ... or a good hosing.

According to Maines' investigations, at various points, high-pressure showers or hoses were also used to treat hysteria (as was clitoridectomies it should be said). One French physician, writing in the mid 1800s, explained that at first this sort of high-powered douching was unpleasant, but then, "the reaction of the organism to the cold, which causes the skin to flush, and the reestablishment of equilibrium all create for many persons so agreeable a sensation that it is necessary to take precautions." Women weren't supposed to indulge in this hydro-therapy for more than four to five minutes ... or else. (Like so much of the woefully inaccurate nonsense surrounding female hysteria, or else what isn't entirely clear.)

7. And the established medical community held onto these beliefs for a very long time.

It's easy to laugh-off female hysteria as preposterous and antiquated pseudo-science, but the fact is, the American Psychiatric Association didn't drop the term until the early 1950s. And though it had taken on a very different meaning from its early roots, "hysterical neurosis" didn't disappear from the DSM -- often referred to as the bible of modern psychiatry -- until 1980. And, sadly, we're still feeling the impact of this highly-entrenched medical diagnosis today. The "crazy" and "hysterical" labels are hard ones for women to completely shake.

Article by Catherine Pearson