Ugly Sweater Party

It was quite a bizarre sight, and just for the record the worthless outfit ran me thirty American Dollars this past Black Friday (i swore i would never shop on that day).  My decision was impulsive, my eyes mesmerized by a mirage of colors....
   ...Three tiered orange button down collared shirt.  The red Tie had Santa in this florescent green and red hue (i think i saw some reindeer too).  An Aqua-Maroon button Up sweater...i can only imagine what Peterman would say.  My Pants, Oh those pants (brought me back to the good old days of the Joker), a dull Purple (with a waist size of 44fourty-four).  Socks?  Oh Yes, they matched my tie, Solid Red.  But the element that i thought (given the tie does give the outfit that special touch) really buys my status are the narrow (yet long) Tan and Brown bowling shoes.  It never dawned on me how slippery those shoes are (makes perfect sense though)...its a good thing that i kept my drinking to a minimum.
    I was more than ready for a party i never got to attend...next year seems so far away...i will take every opportunity to wear my prideful colors to all invited events (would i be disrespecting house of worship wardrobe codes?).  Had i worn this two decades earlier I know I would at least warrant a detention or 2, not to mention some visits from the floor bullies.

Shout out to all the Brothers and Sisters

Especially...all and many..acknowledgments to my readers in South Korea...on the brink of war, taking time out and sharing some thoughts...East meets West!

   As an aside, the most recent and ridiculous story found in the media...in the house of sensationalism...a Floridian teenager gets assaulted by an Otter as he attempted to capture images of the animal on his cell phone.  The Young Fellow is currently sporting a bandage on his right ankle (he was bit there).  As Rodney King once said, "Can't we just All Get Along"


PS Honor yourself, and others will honor you too

Sharing some info

On the Website WebMD in an article by Martin F. Downs he stated some mistakes that all men seemingly make (sometimes over and over again)...in no particular order, and i will not explain his article, its somewhat self-explanatory.
1) Men know what women want
2)Men know what women need
3)Sex feels the same for Men and Women
4)Men know their way around a Woman's Anatomy
5)Wet means Turned On (sorry!)
6)Silence during Sex is Golden (maybe, but not always)

Again speaking from experience...

A restraining order is just another way of saying i love you  :-*

and i am still thinking about you

=-P

They say that love is blind and marriage is an IeyeI opener

So...

if you want a happy marriage

Keep 1one1 eye Shut

Punctilious Safari

     Complication: complexity, intricacy; especially : a situation or a detail of character complicating the main thread of a plot; a making difficult, involved, or intricate; a complex or intricate feature or element; a difficult factor or issue often appearing unexpectedly and changing existing plans, methods, or attitudes

    As a general outsider (with the occasional inside experience), i can absolutely STATE that every human to human dynamic has it fair share of "unexpected" variations to any given situation...and everyone i know offers their best to further deepen that metamorphosis.  Its an unexplained phenomena, considering that we crave stability and consistency...yet we are so quick to toss out our wild cards...Lets call it "tweaking the Design".  Maybe its an unsubstantiated sense of fear for losing control of a situation, perhaps its just an unconscious desire for variety...whatever the purpose, it exists.  With no Rhyme or Reason.

    Another notable consistent behavior within human interconnections is the art of arguing and disagreeing.  Every relationship has those...the more stable ones know how to overcome them.  Correct and forget.  (Maybe not fully correct, but make an amendable bilateral effort to best deal with the situation).  After that, just get ready for the next turbulent issue (small or LARGE...its on its way...trust me).

Lust:  an intense longing : craving; enthusiasm, eagerness; personal inclination : wish; pleasure, delight

  

      When it is impossible to distinguish within a relationship that barrier between love and lust, hold it dear because you are in the midst of a very powerful connection...BOND...one that holds no prejudices nor any boundaries.  I am well aware of how cliche that sounds...how all of this sounds; but these are the markers that stain  two imprisoned converging energies.  Most importantly, if its inevitable that a relationship is close to death...and you are willing to undoubtedly and undeniably fight for it...then you are at the right place, fighting for your instinctual convictions.


P.S.

"I don't want to sound sexist here, but I do think men make better Santa's. Men have bigger bellies, men are used to sitting long periods of time and men have lots of experience making promises they have no intention of keeping."  - Jay Leno.

Those Who

Refuse today to


                make Time For Health and Fitness,


                                         must and will find the time for Illness tommorrow

Paying it Forward

     In the matter of moments while in the midst of a misty evening, i came to a realization of starting a new self tradition...a tradition to give during a day of being thankful...and would you know it...how fate always has a way to present itself.

     I exited the local 7-seveneleven-11just after dropping off my grand mother at her home in Port Jefferson (formerly known as Drown Meadow...gruesome origin behind that name, but that is a blog for another time).  I decided to stop in there specifically because it seemed relatively empty (other then the obvious of wanting something from there).  My car was only the second vehicle in the parking lot, the first had a blonde woman slumped over in the driverside seat...i too found that peculiar and bizarre.  My gut told me to ignore her, so i did.  In and right back Out, three minutes at the very most.  As i stepped off of the curb and took a direct stride in the direction of my driver side door, i heard something eminenting from over my right shoulder (a fairly nondescript noise).  I turned to the direction of the sound, and saw a tall black fellow anxiously holding his phone up...he was almost on the cusp of internally panicking.  

"what was that" i say
"can you do me a favor" he replies
"what's the favor" i respond
"i am not from the area and i need a ride home, my girlfriend just took off with my car"
without hesitating to hear more i ask "where do you live?"?
"coram"
"get in get"
He followed my lead, walked around my car opened the door and off we went...he offered to pay me, i ignored his offering, i wasn't helping him because i wanted his money...i did not want anything from him.  Fifteen15 minutes later, i pull into his driveway, and wish him luck (he confessed to me his ordeal, it involves a second woman and a text message).  Funny i thought, i had a similar incidence once, mine was on purpose though, his not so much.  More like a fool's blunder...its his lesson to learn, and he may.  The ride was my gift on a day for giving.

November 25, 2010

Today, like none other, in our country, which celebrates freedom and ethnic unity...will you find a day, that all families will sit, share, bless, and honor each other...Family Love Should Never Be Taken For Granted or Neglected

On my note, ten adults...four wine?  Yes?  Is that enough?  My family likes the food and wine.  I was thinking pinot noir...Two Pinots (I will have to look in the cellar in order to decide).  Chardonnay?  Nope not in the mood.  Maybe a Zinfandel...and i know which one Earthquake.  The Fourth will be a dessert wine...hmmmm, i will let you know

Cheers and Bon Appetit

Random Thoughts from Katie Desmond

If i am to confess, then i must absolutely address...how guilty it is to obsess, when i regress to the thoughts only a princess has...her name is katie...and she wonders why some do and some don't...ask for...an endowment, "isn't that in excess" shes says?   Why be honest and profess...so unnatural, so out of place (and very much unrepresentative)!  Ah i say, they are only trying to impress...Shes so quick to transgress...Manipulators!!!Liars!!!Cheats!!!  Why shout with distress???  I refuse, absolutely refuse...Do not Depress, my hopes and dreams...Unless...please process...will my mind be able access..Where is the finesse...wondering how to undress???perhaps curious to caress...keep dreaming she tells me...but all i hear is "they're real and spectacular" - Terri Hatcher

So Short With A BIG Chest?

Lonely & Worthless?

Webster says:

Addiction:

Compulsive need for and use of habit-forming substance characterized by tolerance and well defined physiological symptoms upon withdrawal; persistent compulsive use of a substance known by the user to be harmful.  Dependence;  Habits.

     When an individual is able to knowingly identify, as well as, able to reciprocate (without solicitation) love with another individual...This truly marks genuine love.  Its Shared...not drained.

Intimacy = Honesty + Share Oneself

     With addiction, love can not exist because it is an unhealthy dependency influenced by a lack of self esteem and fear of abandonment (all within the jurisdiction of an impaired sense of identity)...when in a relationship and its an addiction, then it becomes about holding on to it at all costs.

     Its not loving too much, but depending on another too much...creating a labyrinth of altering moods.

     An addicted relationship is one whereby the couple has a fixation to the notion of being in the ideal relationship regardless of partner and compatibility.  An alternative type of addiction in relationships, exists when individuals are drawn to specific people or types of relationships.  These situations often are driven through obsessive eyes...and in times of failure fall within a pit of depression.  This individual is willing to bankrupt their own morals, values, and ideals...cause any necessary disruption to their life in order to successfully achieve relationship status...because they depend on a type of person or relationship.  All in Search to find and feel ones self worth, self respect, purpose and meaning.

     A Reliance upon someone or something ExTeRnAl in order to fill emotional needs or avoid pain/fear...just to keep the emotions balanced

Five5words

powerless, harmful, unmanageable, escalation, withdrawal

Some Solutions

Gain Self Knowledge

Recognize emptiness

Healthy countering to pain

New Honest Behaviors

Shift from external to internal intimacy

If you can learn to love yourself, only then you will know how to love your family, friends and your partners.

just roll with me

i never and i mean never drink coffee, because i just don't like it
but today is different, because in two days i allowed myself only about five hours of sleep
i feel tired, restless, and strung out
six cups of coffee down and my focus is scattered
Discipline
my heart is racing, my mood is ornery
(where is the defibrillator)
does anyone know how to use one
my highlight of the day is sharing lorraine's story
shes a crazy woman that my family and i know
somehow she managed to find a female body builder in new jersey
who pays other women to wrestle her on the internet
as to why lorraine found this, i don't know
and its none of my business
but lorraine nominated my sister as a potential combatant
unbeknownst to my sister, a deal was being brokered
i am certain that this will not end well
...
funny story right
i'll nominate trevor to take my sister's spot

Yes, we are all too similarly unique

I am unblemished to
        the fact that I,
               just like everybody else

is littered to perfection 

with infinite imperfections

"Always Drive Safe"-

by Fire Marshall Bill

(your favorite and Mine) 

    Sprang from sleep with fifteen15 minutes to spare...slightly hazed somewhat similar to a Los Angeles summer sky...my phone (on vibrate of course) quietly shivers its method on a low hummmm...lucky for me i am awake and i can see it
Its Angie checking up on me, i assure her that I am on my way.  Off i go, leaving a confused CC at home (he never likes it when i leave him alone)
My ride in (16 minutes removed from REM) was nondescript...the bright sun only compounds my aching head...I Need Water

*just as an aside, your body needs on average 50%percent as in fitty50% of your weight (in ounces) per day...certain days require more, such as dehydrated states

I slowly come to the realization, that i flowed my way through se7en hours last night (unplanned hours) of socializing (i might be conforming into a socialist?).  What happened?, What did i do?, Who did i see?,  Uh huh.  On a day (11-20-10) that i spent si6x hours listening to lectures and watching horrific traffic movies, i violated just about every possible traffic law (count them 34ish) in creation on my way home early this morning...i should be permanently disbarred from ever driving my car, or any car ever again...seriously!  No wonder my car insurance is nine9000thousand $dollars$a-year
memories are like buried treasure...coming in waves...i need to pull out my metal detector...reason my way to some common sense (maybe even justify my shenanigans)
its twelve12noon at this very moment, i really need to work off my hangover...be back later...hopefully if the police don't drag me away before then
I told you that i would be Back...fourteen hours (14:00:00) later!!! No jail time...phew.
My memory of the weekend has come back in segments...and yes it has taken me, longer then a day to overcome my hangover (i never get those...curse those beers and the deviant temptress impersonating bartenders).  Maybe its not an act?

 Stupidity will breed more stupidity...and so on    continually feeding

Just Another

Silly

Stupid

Saturday

     The night began at some "ranch", it was my idea, Joe and Don obliged me.  Don didn't like Doug...as a matter of fact he gave him a new (yet old, i am sure) name, four letters long, starts with D (just like Doug, only different), one vowel, ends with a K.  Elizabeth, our waitress agreed...she is sweet and personable, even a little shy (can you be both?  Personable and Shy?)...but she was...and she had a nice large smile.  Her red hair concealed by a cowboy hat...cute for a woman, tacky for a fella.  She is slightly out of shape, but i can forgive her (its her freckles).  Eighty80Minutes later, our ship crashes, and our siren finds us.  Angelic.  Her soft Voice Mutes My Heart...I'm not the only one...she has many suitors...shes too young to realize that.  Her primary aggressor, acknowledges me twice.  He's smart and respectful in doing so...i give him a pass.  We walk up to the Old Port Pub.  Sleazy, Filthy, Flirty, Disgusting.  I Find Her, April/Autumn...smoking a cigarette.  Nothing is as unattractive as a woman and a cigarette...makes her smell bad and taste worse.  I let her know that i disapprove, i take it from her...i know that i crossed a line...but i was still bothered with her flagrant tactics from the costume day (nothing sexy about classless).  Richie apologizes on my behalf, i tell him he shouldn't have bothered...its because he knows that he'll see her again... i may never...i feel disgusted and morally violated (Why?  I didn't do anything wrong?  Right?).  Back to the Siren, shes gone, the boat is closed and grounded...Any takers for Tommy's?  What the heck.  Not as visually dark...only my mind with its shades of gray.  Young drunk people completely engulf the floor.  Joe gets emotionally stonewalled...out from nowhere...he wants pizza (i guess he got hungry).  We stumble next door only to find the same young crowd...the young ones, as cute as they may be...still lack that earthly wisdom that age will bring.  Pity.  They will not get a Pass on that. Joe treats me to 2two2 slices (a regular and a buffalo chicken).  I eat them at home sometime after fo4ur...when i got home, alone.  I like my personal space, just about most of the time.
I close my eyes...and like that i sprang back up...

Value Whats Important

   The American family (for those that have a Television set and use it, check out the show 'Modern Families', i hear that its hysterical) is one that (for the most part) seems fragmented and disconnected from its genesis that dates back to the 1950's.  Good old time American Traditions.  From Leave it to Beaver to the Brady Bunch, and everyone before, during and after...all had a common theme of family connectivity and unity.  We live in the generation of text messaging and emailing...only with appointments can you spend time with relatives, partners, and friends.  Am I the only one that sees fault in this set-up?
   The modern home will sport a Television and/or computer...seemingly in just about every room...with cell phone in pocket i am off to conduct an investigation into the death of our family values.  With the holiday season about to christen the public masses (food and festivities galore; why gorge the soul?), we are full throttle immersed into this never ending yet so overly hypnotic commercial holiday season (one that usually starts with candy and ends with a resolution...i deal with many resolutionists).
    Maybe it is time to start new traditions...even if they last only fif15teen minutes.  Set aside those Hectic work schedules so you can all sit together share a meal/snack, or to take a short walk, and if you really can manage it take a trip (hold the itineraries for someone else).  Basically do something to spend time together and hear each other out...use it as a time to reconnect...bring back that needed sense of belonging.
Parades, holiday parties, religious services,  volunteer at soup kitchens/charity functions/shelter, shop for gifts and crafts, make greeting cards/home decorations/holiday treats, attend plays/concert, play in the snow...so many different ways to spend time with those whom are important in your life.  Since each family is different, solutions are never simple (ie...single mom/part time dad, step parent, foster family, blended family, same sex couple or any variation on today's nuclear family set up).  No matter, or however complicated your situation may be (or uncomplicated, its all the Good ; ), its in the effort of finding "new" ways to see each other more...

Re-Create Love Stop Critcism

Hostility:  Deep seeded ill will (usually, yet not always a mutual emotional state); conflict, opposition, or resistance in thought or principle.

"Constant kindness can accomplish much. As the sun makes ice melt, kindness causes misunderstanding, mistrust, and hostility to evaporate."  - Albert Schweitzer

     I could not have said it better myself...So True.  Even honesty or understanding without compassion will fade within a lull of passive hostility.  I find myself continually smirking into the den of animosity, with the feeling that friction and malice is a wasteful road that only circles one back in the path of progression...A vindictive feud ultimately needs to be immediately exposed and addressed (under composed conditions of course).  Calmly address the source of hostility (communication; how many times will we hear this?  Its sickening), keeping the focus on the hostile stimulus (versus reliving past hostilities).  People who feel victimized need to understand that by shifting their focus to a pertinent participant within the relationship, will eventually force a powerful and potent component for that all elusive progressive growth needed to advance along the road of resolution.  Communication and understanding is essential to defusing tense situations...its that simple.  How patient and persistent can you be to achieve your goal of...resolution.

Acknowledgment

Happy 31st Birthday

to My Loyal and devoted Reader

Michael

have a good one today!

This will be your first and only Thirty-First birthday 

Blame Never Solves Anything

I will apologize in advance for all the technical mumble jumble, but it is important to recognize that there is a direct correlation between your emotional status and your physical being...so be kind with your heart and allow your body to flourish...bathe it in the warmth that you permit to be engulfed by...

      One of the most prevalent hormones circulating within the human body is cortisol (which is your body's fight or flight hormone...nicknamed the "stress" hormone of the body).  It serves for many necessary functions such as:  insulin release and glucose metabolism, blood pressure regulation, immune and inflammatory function, quick burst of energy, heighten memory, lower sensitivity to pain, and the basic backbone to maintaining homeostasis within the body...this all sounds good and important (albeit, a bit overwhelming to take in all at once).
     Prolonged states of elevated cortisol levels will lead to a less than desirable state by the host:  impairing cognitive performance, suppressing thyroid function, imbalances in blood glucose levels, decreasing bone density and muscle tissue, high blood pressure, suppressed immunity, increase in abdominal fat ( as well as, lowering of "good" cholesterol and increasing levels of "bad" cholesterol)...leading the body down a path a numerous physiological dysfunctions.
     Managing stress is much easier achieved in theory as opposed to being actively practiced in reality...there are techniques that can help you help manage it...ultimately, you would need to find what works best for you...

Stress:  a physical, chemical, or emotional factor that causes bodily or mental tension

     Bottled UP...People, for varies reason will shield their emotions...emotions that absolutely need to be openly expressed (or burned off?  Is it all the same?) and shared with those whom need to understand them or with anyone willing to listen.  A "collaborator" of emotional expenditures.  Otherwise what can happen?
One can develop anti-social behavior, enter a state of depression, experience temper outbursts, discover and endure gestational discomforts, low energy levels, weak hair follicle and nail cuticles...just to name a few.
You get the idea, it is a solitary state of existence with endless drawbacks immersed in a seemingly irreversible emotional cyclical roller coaster ride.  Complicated sentence, complicated emotions...lets figure them out.
     An Empath (derived from the Greek origin of pathos) is an individual whose imaginative projection of a subjective state gets infused into a Focal Point.  A capacity to internally experience the happiness or sadness of another sentiment being through consciousness rather than physically.  These individuals through reflective emotional implosions creative feedback loops of feelings.  A negative cycle is similar to a virus; spiraling out of control completely infecting and generating a venomous atmosphere of desolate despondency.  On the flip side, a positive upswing creates an intensely addictive and intoxicating euphoric state...which is the exact element that develops a state of dependency between two individuals.
     Holding in emotions eventually leads to fights because the barer of those feelings is constantly harboring those emotions...holding them in and dragging them about; always around and suppressed (buried deep)  < Just learn to Express >!  Always and Never are accusatory words intended to blind, blame, and sinfully guilt...nothing ever gets resolved while finger pointing.  By properly expressing the true nature of any problem and/or concern, 2two will work as one1...where condemnation ceases to exist.  Your most effective tool is the ability to actually listen to your counter part...this is coming from a deaf guy (ironic?)  If need be, step away from each other (two minutes 2:00 or two hours 2:00:00), how ever long...just take the time to cool down and calmly fortify a resolution.
     Survive the fight, live an other day?  Maybe a day whereby you feel stronger together?  Fighting with closure can be a therapeutic road in any relationship (under proper precautions coupled with a mutual understanding).

ECM

     Next time you go somewhere...somewhere out...Remember, that it is very important.  Understand that you do have choices...All sort of choices.  In your face, fostered by corporate America$ (that is all you are to them a dollar sign...a bottom line...even if it costs you your health)...Right in front of you.  Take ownership!  Every Choice Matters

Rearrange that and you have E=MC^2

So choose wisely.
Try to stay close to home.
For your own good and those around you!
Be apart of your community

Method of anarchy

My    r an d o m    mind

has an eye for detecting

           order within the maelstrom existence

                of chaos we see as lawlessness

Approach Bait, bite bait, get hooked...get reeled and then cook yourself right up

    Lets talk generalities...it almost makes this sound as if its a black or white matter...and i always have had a difficult time rationalizing those sort of matters, because i know that the world we live in is mostly (if not all) grey.  Here go the four4 general traits that i  would like to bring to your attention.  First up is personality type...lets make two categories:

Extrovert: a gregarious and unreserved individual; an exhibitionist

Introvert:  to turn inward or onto oneself; a reserved individual

Just about everyone fits in one or the other...a loud mouth or the quiet one.
Now with both personality types you have a secondary driving force that fuels their engines..one of the confident or a non-confident varietal.

Confidence: a feeling or consciousness of one's powers or of reliance on one's circumstances; faith or belief that one will act in a right, proper, or effective way; the quality or state of being certain : certitude

Non-confidence:  Uncertain; not adequately guarded or sustained; deficient in assurance : beset by fear and anxiety

It has been documented that approximately ninety95five %percent% of all individuals fall within the category of non-confident.  I found that interesting when i read that as well.  By default only five % of individuals that you see are of the confident type...so where am i going with this?

Observing a social setting, one would find confident extroverts, non-confident extroverts, confident introverts, and finally non-confident introverts.  Although the last category is almost an oxymoron considering that those type of  individuals would rarely allow themselves to be seen in a public social settings.  Anyhow.  This places three types of individuals within a social environment...so what happens next?  People play, mix and mingle...interact.  Who will be the most successful?  The confident extrovert...because...they approach everyone, this maximizes their chances of accruing positive social interactive situations.  The least successful will be the absentee type:  non-confident introvert...their personality type is fed by negativity and pessimism, hence making themselves socially invisible.

What makes the confident extrovert most successful?  Willingness to approach everybody.  Plus confident people, due to their success (in socializing) they spend Less Time THINKING about THEMSELVES and more about whom they are engaged in...that is a primary element to succeeding.  Stop worrying about how you are perceived and start paying attention to someone that you would want to socialize with.  When you are focused on others, you become more aware about their nonverbal cues...which will help progress (for better or worse), your social interaction.

False Devotions

Fidelity:  the quality or state of being faithful; accuracy in details; exactness

Infidelity:  lack of belief of religion; unfaithfulness to a moral obligation: disloyalty; marital unfaithfulness or an instance of it

Jealousy:  intolerant of rivalry or unfaithfulness, disposed to suspect rivalry or unfaithfulness; hostile toward a rival or one believed to enjoy an advantage; vigilant in guarding a possession

What Happens...

     In reaction to a perceived act of infidel.?.?.A corrosive state of unreasonable jealousy

Then???

    A rift may develop between the partners since this can be seen (or misconstrued?) as too controlling.

Next : /

     The jealous partner may seek comfort elsewhere...what a vicious cycle

Best Approach

     A lack of trust is the foundation for jealous emotions...Commit to OPENLY communicate, be honest about your emotions and desires...these are the primary indicators in which the direction of any relationship is destined for.

     Each relationship has a physical and an emotional connectivity that must be met.  It is often seen if one partner feels neglected in either of the two...in turn...creating a  need to fill that physical or emotional void will drive them to seek out an outlet to consummate this physical and/or emotional incompleteness.

    Divorce rates are higher then ever, so why stay faithful?  Staying faithful means you are keeping a promise...fulfilling your word.  Your feelings are Focused...Your energy is Directed.  This places you in the midst of solving marital issues with your partner...if BOTH choose to communicate for the purpose of resolving conflicts

A failure to work together will lead to a diluted relationship with little intimacy and scattered emotional energies.  The richest gifts in fidelity...loyalty and love...A healthy relationship is beyond any physical and emotional tie, it is an eternal bond destined for ever growing love

Everything in life is a choice

Strength comes from within

How strong

Are

You

Love is more than an Emotion, its an ability

     How important are your friends to your level of health?  People who have subnormal social ties are twice as likely to catch colds, as well as, suffer from heart ailments and illnesses.  There is a direct correlation between cardiovascular fitness (and stress levels) with the amount of social involvement an individual participates in.  Smile More Often, even to strangers...you will feel as uplifted as they will.  Friends help us recover from injuries (emotional, physical, and psychological), surgeries, and illnesses...the closer they are in your proximity (physical, emotional, and topographical), the speedier your recovery.  Strange isn't it?  I can't say I am surprised by it though.  That your well being and your social networking are intertwined...meaning that mutual friends and acquaintances have a disproportionate affect on your quality of life.  What does socializing do?  Decrease stress, yes?  Enhance mood, perhaps?  Help your well being?  Absolutely!  3Three to Six6 hours a day of social interacting will help minimize the likelihood that a bad day does not occur (or create comfort in the midst of a negative circumstance)...Friends are all around us.  One 1in3 Three people have a best friend at work...those people have been shown to engage in a considerably higher quality of work...just as an aside the NY Mets, whats their excuse?
     There are many days where by i feel blessed that i am surrounded by friends, family, and co-workers (with many work environment individuals) that suffocate me with a great deal of goodness and love...it truly goes beyond any limit that i could possibly envision.  I am truly lucky...i hope the same for all...

How do you feel today

It is November Seventh of the Year Twenty Ten

11/07/10

The latest that i could remember...and as far as i know 

It's Nine 9:13 Thirteen my time

The Fall Time change went into effect

Do you feel any different over

the change?

Give Blood

                                                                                                                                                                                                  +++++++++++++
                                                            A

     The average human adult has approximately 10 pints of blood.  Size and gender does factor as to how much blood your body will have.  For example a petite woman can have only fi5ve or so pints where as a large adult male may have upwards twe12lve pints...every individual truly is unique and special in so many ways.  In my home state of New York, we are having a blood shortage.  New York Hospitals are purchasing blood from other states (ie...places like Kentucky...I've been there Once!  Never again) in order to adequately supply the necessary medical demand.  Well folks, today i am donating a pint of blood...one pint for me considering my above average size (quantitatively speaking) is minimal...especially if i can help a fellow new yorker (as emotionally expressive as they can be...I'll still help him/her out) the cost is well worth this benefit.

Nutrition FACT of the day

Ninety some odd percent of products in your supermarket are corn related products (to some degree)...the remaining ten or so percent are auxiliary affiliates of corn!!!!!

How healthy are you really eating?

READ your ingredients next time you're in a supermarket

Groggy Friday Nonesense

Cherish:to hold dear : feel or show affection for; to keep or cultivate with care and affection; to entertain or harbor in the mind deeply and resolutely

Question of the day:  What do you cherish most in life?

     Over seventy percent of individuals will answer that their marriage/relationship/kinship tops this list.  We idealize the bond with our mate, we idolize our offspring and the hope and joy that they bring us...we revere our ability to sustain a working status, we delight in the companionship of our friendships.  Each connection should have a vision, if you want it to be firm and cohesive...durable, able to endure the rigors and challenges that life bestows upon that bond...and life will vigorously challenge the integrity of all alliances.  What is the sense of living without enduring (that is how we seem to learn best).  EVERYONE will be Challenged.

     With all the demur and dissident elements in situations, one must present a plan of action.  The better the plan, the likelihood of success increases, yes?  If the challenge is a relationship, then what is the plan?

    First outline your level of commitment and what you are looking to offer to your relationship...then determine what sort of spouse/mate best counters and compliments you (*be careful of creating unnecessary limitations*)...selecting well is necessary in order to help achieve what you are looking for.  Once this is determined, what sort of meaningful relationship do you expect to have with your partner/mate.  What is exceptional, consequential, and imperative to your bond?  If the answers are not convergent with your core goals, values, and ideals...then you are bound to confuse the direction of your relationship.  Reevaluate and correct/modify (to the best of your ability) your situation...or find someone different.  Couples who are out of sync will stall...

...So don't stall.  Start by outlining strengths and weaknesses as seen through the eyes of your significant other...remember to truthfully identify the traits as opposed to ideally stating what you would assume to hear.  Now compare those strengths and weaknesses with what you strive to offer...the closer you are, the stronger your connection will be; the further apart...then the more misleading your relationship will be.  In a divergent situation, you must commit to a modification in your behavior in order to bridge that distension, ultimately being able to offer what you truly promised your mate and relationship.
Keep in mind that not all individuals fall within such a cut an dry type of evaluation/analysis...meaning you can always meet someone outside of the spectrum of what you are looking for that can change your entire perspective...its the old unexplained infatuation factor...it can strike anyone at any given moment, without warning.

Remember you can not control or change your mate.  But what you can control is your behavior, as well as, what you can and do contribute to your relationship.

For Bennett and Lauren and everybody else!

     Where does the positive inspiration come from?  Character decency and integrity are intrinsic qualities that can make any ship stay afloat in relation to the current and surf.  Etiquette and honor with a high-mindedness to the righteousness that connect that boat to the water...a certain healthy level of respect any sailor has for his ocean (and she can be one wicked mate).
these strong connections hinge on a friendship first approach...do you like their company?  Are they your best friend?  That is where the TRUE STAYING POWER lays.  That connection will strengthen with amicable qualities such as humor...if you can laugh with/at each other, that is a wonderful way to defuse hostile conflicts in aggressive settings.  Credible words and actions create a trusted bond and dependable infallibility.  (Back up your words!)  By following through with your initiatives.
We've spoken about communication...those who identify and then openly express their emotions develop an environment conducive for dealing with relationship challenges...hold it in, and your frustrations will sink your dreams.  Shared responsibility.  Does it not seem as if all these topics have been broached before?  Your responsibilities will range from chores to parenting (within an agreeable accord between the two of you of course!).  By dividing and conquering, you will ultimately lessen any chance of  experiencing/enduring episodes of ReSentMent.  Sometimes you may have to contribute when you do not want too, but the end result is a mutual contribution to the shared status of your relationship.
Physical, emotional, and intimate availability.  These are all big ones too.  Staying connected, sometimes without words can be the strongest evidence of your commitment and devotion.  To counterbalance your connection keep mutual, as well as, separate confidants and acquaintances!  Remember there is the Now...but there will also be a tomorrow...where will you be next decade?

The above traits are necessary to achieve a strong and healthy connection...there are some pitfalls as published by a Mr Gottman, he calls them his apocalyptic predictors:

criticism: to find fault with : point out the faults of ;to consider the merits and demerits of and judge accordingly
contempt:  the act of despising : the state of mind of one who despises;lack of respect or reverence for something

defensiveness: devoted to resisting or preventing aggression or attack


stonewalling: to engage in obstructive parliamentary debate or delaying tactics;to be uncooperative, obstructive, or evasive

With everything discussed, pros and cons...were is your sail set for?

Generation ME

4Me x (More)Me + (Your)Sacrifice - (Not So Much My) Sacrifice

= 

(What I Want)
div%ided 

1

Sounds obnoxious and selfish...hard to fathom that there is so much greed within any given dynamic:

Actual

You + I = Us

Ideal

~50% + ~50% = (always adds up to)1 

Your reality may not be on equal terms, but if its a healthy situation and someone can contribute a little extra for the greater good without losing their identity, then its not necessarily a lost cause if the collective conscious of the relationship is vectored to a happy and honest medium.  In other words, work together...give when you have too, take if/when you must...but remember its a shared situation (give +/- take)

There are three formulas, but only two will apply to you...which 2 do? 

Don't Blame Me...I Won't Blame You

When you stumble and fall...              

          will your partner be there to

lift you

                                                Or

                                                          Blame you?

Its a thought for reflection...Most relationships, even in the deepest/darkest depths still have a resuscitating chance to be revitalized through a nurturing attitude and combined effort from both hands that feed ONE heart.  A heart that is conjoined through emotion and glue by faith...Yet sharp tongues and ill fated tears pierce through the very core devaluing its authenticity and shackling its partners into a void of sadness and complexity.

    Why do we blame?  It might be a projection of mismanaged frustrated feelings...and the only known way to release these pent-up emotions is by outwardly bursting and blaming the closest available candidate.  (As an aside, it was election day...did you vote?)  Becoming a smorgasbord of erupted verbal abuse of sorts.  Unreasonable accusations soon become the norm...How UnFair!

Step one, identify the real source of contention.  Step two, credibly evaluate the legitimacy of the concern.  Third, reasonably discuss the issue and peacefully (once and for all) resolve the problem...Simple, Yes?  Maybe?  From my eye, its always easier when the target is afarrrr...but when its my fire, i seem to get burnzzz on my hand.

Will this divide or will this unite?

Blame is not the disease but the symptom that will plague your relationship...

! # 1

Judgements

+

ASSumptions

=

?

Honey vs Vinegar

     Overcritical and Rejective...would you say that you know someone who is hypercritical and constantly faultfinding.  How desirable do you find their company?  On the flip side is it fair to subject somebody else to those biases?  A tendency to judge by unreasonably strict standards with a querulous and exacting temperament...so captious and censorious!
   The Golden Rule in life is.......treat as you wish to be treated...anything less and that creates a hypocrite.  Therefore why judge?  When you loathe imposed verdicts?  Why chastise when you fear your own reprimands?
    Verbal Discrimination of any sort is a major fault within the stability of a relationship...mercilessly discerning thoughts and conduct will undoubtedly lead to a disrupted connection of a harmonious equilibrium.

No Human being can tame the tongue.  It is a restless EVIL, full of deadly poison.  We can praise and curse with that very tongue...Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring?  My brothers and sisters, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water. 

-James 3:7

What if?  You would share glory, express all favorable accounts...resoundingly choose to celebrate acts, gestures, behaviors, and interactions with your chosen company.  An adored individual commends the highest of compliments...and this will help magnify that stability, that connection one strives to achieve.

Which do you choose?

Condemn or commend?

Written by Pam

Each one of us
              Has a crtoss to bare

                       Some choose to carry it

                                   Others drag it 

                                            Even crawl with it

                                                              Or will you

                                                                     Let it drag you?




Modified by Nancy
        further Modified by Patrick

On St. Hallo's Eve

     As boring as my Halloween costume may have been, i did achieve my subdued status within the confines of this paganistic ambiance in a vortex of an alcohol-induced debauchery of a festival.  People give themselves permission on this date to live their lives through the eyes of their alter ego...consequence free...in many ways i get to witness who these people truly wish to be.  Cloaked behind their heart's camouflage, disguised to trick and in many ways treat
KNOCK-KNOCK
For the next twenty24four or so hours, my branded marks remained instilled upon my body...my left wrist with its pink collar and the back of my right hand with a stamp...which remained invisible to the naked eye; only a black light can illuminate and reveal its presence.
     My Saturday night was a blur, and only after my mid morning nap did my maelstrom of a memory become exposed to the events of the previous evening.  I spent the next three hours triaging my stories of that fleeting twilight.  During those three hours, i cleaned and mulched half of my yard, allowing all those affairs to ooze out of every pore of my flesh, allowing them to flow up and out and into my heavens baring light upon all lost thoughts.
   Candy my was first Shepard on my journey...dressed as a geisha, she ushered my path through a crystalline cold maze of drizzle and immorality.  Unveiling a distorted burn that trickled down the throat.

geisha :a Japanese girl or woman who is trained to provide entertaining and lighthearted company especially for a man or a group of men 

 Candy was the queen of an ocean filled with nurses, doctors, dancers, butterflies, gypsies, fairies, lady gaga, barbies, Greek goddesses, cat woman, snooki, and even a snow white...each was here to tease and entice...flirt with their eyes and sway their hips...from side to side.  The music was blaring, the crowd was loud and boisterous...blistering with youth and energy (so much deviant energy).  Right up ringside for a squabble, Raggedy Anne kamikazed this borderline delirious scandalously dressed nurse.  Landing three hay-makers to her right cheek...Don rescued them both...No harm no foul?

That became my cue for my exodus, i went to go find my enchanting serenading siren.  My ungratifying search had less then a desirable outcome...she was hidden on a day where the inner self would unearth.  Her beautiful voice would not be heard.  I jumped off the boat and took refuge up the road...to an old hole in the ground.

OPEN SEsame
It's a narrow room, yet very long...i walk to back...visually introducing myself to all hooded festival cohorts.  One by one, i can see them all, but do they know that i can see through their facade?  I reach the back...i get greeted by Autumn, her beautiful face concealed by a suggestively sultry disguise.  Her eyes connect with mine, she smiles...its p a u s e d  Joe orders our round.  With beer in hand i can see the sleazy fellow at the end there, is making Autumn uneasy ( i keep on wanting to call her April)...maybe because everything dies in the fall...yet her charm and beauty electrifies the room.  A tall voluptuous blonde catches my eye.  I smile and here she comes...meet Erica.  I have never met her, but her sister Sandy is an old acquaintance.  She is deliciously blessed with clear skin and lucent blue eyes...a soft and delicate smile...shes a tigress tonight (and most likely every night).  Her tail swaying, i can almost swear that i can hear a playful purr in her voice...Autumn comes by and aggressively pets her.  Odd and seductive.  Joe and I leave, to go find Billy...he always invites us over on Saturdays.
A lot of the same, with different faces...but how could you tell.  NoNdescript.  And like that we're out.  We go and find Don.  Joe informs him that he wants to go Jazz it UP.  That's a no go for Don, one fight is enough for him tonight.  After a slice of pizza, i obliged Joe.  
     Its a long walk up these stairs, step by step, i can feel the ghosts that have made this walk...the walls spoke with despair and air stale with depravity.  i reach the top and receive my stamp.  We walk around this hoard of people dancing and drinking in conjunction with the music.  Joe's little Goddess...right there in front of us...seemingly along or is she being ignored?  Not by Joe.  If only Joe brought his club, he could whack her on the head and drag her back to his cave...no one would notice that the lonely pretty lady went missing (just my feeling).  That is the second time that i have seen, and the second time that she was alone.  A dark cloud blankets me.  I recognize this beauty.  Shes a Raven haired femme fatale three years removed from my past.  The temptress leans in with her shapely physique and whispers into my ear how she was just thinking about me.  I can feel her seductive soft smoooothe satin dress as i casually caress her hip.  Like any bird in flight, she flocks back to her crowded abyss.  It's time...Joe and I depart.  Its Oh Two Hundred, Joe stumbles out of my car...twenty minutes later I'm in my bed...too tired to think...my eyes closed and five hours later they awoke...
Where was I and what did i see?