Sophistry

            Relationships are living

its an

existing bond

between two

consenting parties

                  WHY is it that we believe that OUR own happiness can be a creation of someones words or actions?  Someone other then US?
that the experience of Pain and Joy can come from their hand?
Is it possible...that somebody else loves us more than...dare i say love ourselves...?

     Our society and its structure, whether its here and now, or of yesteryear...is the genesis that formulates our beliefs of societal roles.  That is the principle that entraps our mind to create expectations.  With expectations come standards.  Standards will either be met or missed.  This depends upon the setting bestowed by the evaluator.  Hence...Interpretation is in the eye of the beholder.
Therefore an individuals perception will dictate any given situation.  Unrealistic standards coupled with individual perception can potentially lead to a tumultuous state of existence.  Which will help explain the life of any given relationship.
The success and longevity of a bond lies in the strength rooted by both parties.  If expectations are reasonable, it sets the table for a flourishing connection.  Water the ground, and watch a beautiful growth evolve...together, they will sprout under the warmth of all encompassing SUN

Circle of Eight

On January 27th, in the year 2006 i hosted a dinner party with seven guests.  Fillet mignon was the headliner, a multitude of side dishes along with a cart full of appetizers served as the entourage.  Dessert?  Some nondescript cake, i can't even tell you who made it.  To cap off the menu, the most important aspect to bind our gathering came via from our  final arrival.  I remember her well, because she had the allure and solidity to leave a lasting impression.  In many ways i am speaking about the eighth guest.  She held her own personality, which never guarantees how agreeable that can be in any given social setting.  She was both my friend and guest, yet i still held a certain level of expectation from her.
After all, it is within my prerogative to create some sort of anticipated behavior and/or reaction from interacting parties within any given interrelationship.  Ultimately, it is my perception and how i  allow it to furnish my landscape inwhich any and all my guests will be summoned into.
And so it shall begin
I choose my instrument of choice, an old gift with much power.  I drive its angled tip lightly into the surface as i begin to rotate my right grip in a counter clockwise direction.  I meet my shallow end, flip it up and drop it down.  Wedge it in good.  Sudden thrust up.  POP!
Meet guest number eight, 1998 Sassicaia.  Legends have been created to honor this goddess.  I expected to become enlightened...uniquely seduced with her charming trance.  I slowly let her flow from her home into my cradle.  Nestled in my palm.  Cheers...we raise our chalices, we say our prayers and wishes with all endeavors.  Clingggggg.   Crystal always creates a harmonious yet heavenly ring, like none other.  As if angels were singing.  She officially announces her arrival with an array of aromas reminiscent of spice, meat and berries.  My enticed lips caress the edge of the glass, she flows onto my palate and introduces me with a full bodied surge of soft and velvety juice.  She sits there, swirling side to side.  The ground shifts, i fall into a fantastical paradise.  Her essence lingers, but after her slow long dance, she does fade...forever in my memory.  Eternal bliss.
I turn to my left, to guest number four....?
"Yeah, thats ok" she says...Maybe she is more a dessert woman

No Twofers on this Tuesday

The weather outside is wet, damp and humid.  Most people that i dealt with today had no defining drive to conquer their daily challenges.  Blase as they say.  Leaving me quite unimpressed with effort and production.  Come to think of it, i belong on that ferry ride.  Compagnon de voyage.  That is the business side of the day, as far as the personal aspect of my immediate domain, perhaps one curious and brave soul peeked her head outside of the her rabbit hole.  I do feel somewhat slighted by the lack of generated interest behind my logical words intended to drive thought provoking actions.  Which may bring me to my next point.
Surface.  Glance at the ocean.  Notice the wave, but you will miss all the fish.  Take a boat out (not a ferry), dive in and swim.  Feel the cool splash, refreshing swaying only a peaceful and soulful destination can offer.  Surge forth with heroic devotion.  Take a leap of faith, like i said dive and swim. Uncharted waters brought the old world into a new exploit of human industrial evolution.

From the shore, you may miss the swell and skirmish the rip tide may give.

Single Life

The human ideology drives us to find our "perfect" mate.  Settle down.  Make a family.  Grow old happy.  Simple right?  Attainable?  Is it?  I do not know, i'm sorry that i do not have an answer for you.  If life were only that simple.  Funny though, that perfect and human fall within the same idea.  Afterall, life is saturated with imperfections...that is the beautiful gift that we are all given.  That rollercoaster ride, day in and day out.  All those unexpected twists and turns, sudden highs and drastic lows.  Can anything be perfect?  With all this wiggle room, how can it.  Then why i ask do we seek the "perfect" relationship, the ever so elusive "perfect" mate?  Maybe we are all "waiting for Godot".  Does it exist?  Is it out there?  I bet a small minority swear that it exists, a much larger minority may believe its very possible...and the vast majority are left to believe that it has forever escaped their fleeting grasp.
Dare i say, speak on some worldly advice on this matter?  Heathens in some afterlife would spew hearsay hypocrisy, drowning me in some idiocy (perhaps it would be deservingly so).  As an aside, its my blog, let me invent my own words and ideas for that matter, lets discuss them together and find our greater way.  I truly would be that blind Sheppard leading my heard through some visionless plateau of lonely destitute.  See that, i have already given myself more credit then i deserve.  After all, this is my first blog.  Of how many, i do not know.  Much to my chagrin, i gave up soothsaying in past life.  Let me finish day one first.
Why?  Because.  How is that for my answer.  Let it be yours from now on, when someone challenges you with a WHY?  And after you answer with your because, give them that screw you pat on the back, with a smile of course =).  A wink is bonus, just so you know.  Pinot anyone?  As in Noir of course, how i wish that i had a glass at this very moment.  Back to the juice, and its not the red kind!
Relationships, the albatross of so many.  Maybe the real task is finding compatibility rather then perfection.  The ability to compromise rather then dominate.  A relationship might have to bare many forms and flavors to satisfy varying appetites.  Perhaps such is Rocky Road ice cream.  You have the backbone of chocolate ice cream.  That can be the everyday life interactions that any relationship has.  You have your soft and amicable marshmallows mixed in, those can be the good days, the nice places, the days that smiles fixate on our faces.  We have our peanuts, our unpredictable bites that come with a crunch. Not always problematic, but potentially devastating if mistreated.  How can and should you eat Rocky Road?  See that i always bring it back to  food.
Its about dealing with that adversity that a relationship brings.  All relationship carry it.  I might even venture to say that more then half  have failed?  Why?  Because we refuse to adjust our bite...cream versus crunch.  Remember my word from before...COMPROMISE.  If you are to understand someone.  Know how to meet them halfway.  Offer the path a reasonable destination point.
Now that i have laid the foundation to a problem that plagues us all to some degree, on several levels.  Why am i writing about this?  Because! ; )
I recently promise a friend, a single friend of mine that i would create  a blog about single life.  My friend has long died in the shallow waters of hurt and sorrow.  Bless he be, i won't grant him his last rights quite yet, give me at least three more blog nights before we decide what happens to Joe.  I too am single, longer then Joe, albeit, not that much longer.  Nonetheless longerrrrr.  And sometimes, that's all it takes to be enough!  Three weeks ago Joe confessed that he paid a kings ransom to some dating website.  Six months=zero dates.
Poor, poor, poor little Joe.  Its more then figuratively speaking.  Back to Why?  Here comes my because.  Good you're getting the hang of that.  I lightly browsed one of Joe's sites.  Stuck my toe in the water.  I found over five hundred women looking for some sort of positive companionship.  So Joe must not be trying, or he is too picky, maybe he feels safe being lonely and feeling sorry for himself...only Joe can tell us?  Joe?
Anyhow, sticking my toe in, on my first day i got four nibbles.  Not too shabby considering that i never even posted a picture.  Had i had a picture the generated interest increases by some %Eighty% or so advertised on the website.  And i believe it.  We as a species are initially attracted by looks, hence why photos work.  What would a photo have done for me?  I can't tell you since i didn't take that route.  But let me tell you that my looks according to people not my mother (or grandmother), say i am handsome.  I am above average in height.  I workout vigorously between five to seven days a week.  I eat well and smart.  I keep good hygiene.  I have a lot going for me on the superficial front.
Lets leave our WHY? and get to our What?  Answer THIS!  i am going to stick my leg a little further in the adventures of dating.  I haven't been on a date in a while, a first date in years for that matter.  Just a couple of weeks ago i asked a gorgeous and sweet young lady out for a rendezvous.  She decline on the premise this would not be the best time.  Oh by the way, i made it a point to meet her mother and smooze her over.  I think that she might think that her daughter might have a nice options.  Just saying just in case you are reading this, that i am still available.  Anyhow, i will test to see how this journey will treat me.  I will write my adventures here and share them with you...maybe we can help each other.



P.S. Let me Apologize in Advance if I unknowing or unintentionally offend anyone (my aim is not to create a crusade to upset my readership)...I respectfully request you not read my thoughts, opinions and words if you feel as if anything I say and/or write that may cause any unpleasant emotions or any discomfort of any sort. Thank you!