Groggy Friday Nonesense

Cherish:to hold dear : feel or show affection for; to keep or cultivate with care and affection; to entertain or harbor in the mind deeply and resolutely

Question of the day:  What do you cherish most in life?

     Over seventy percent of individuals will answer that their marriage/relationship/kinship tops this list.  We idealize the bond with our mate, we idolize our offspring and the hope and joy that they bring us...we revere our ability to sustain a working status, we delight in the companionship of our friendships.  Each connection should have a vision, if you want it to be firm and cohesive...durable, able to endure the rigors and challenges that life bestows upon that bond...and life will vigorously challenge the integrity of all alliances.  What is the sense of living without enduring (that is how we seem to learn best).  EVERYONE will be Challenged.

     With all the demur and dissident elements in situations, one must present a plan of action.  The better the plan, the likelihood of success increases, yes?  If the challenge is a relationship, then what is the plan?

    First outline your level of commitment and what you are looking to offer to your relationship...then determine what sort of spouse/mate best counters and compliments you (*be careful of creating unnecessary limitations*)...selecting well is necessary in order to help achieve what you are looking for.  Once this is determined, what sort of meaningful relationship do you expect to have with your partner/mate.  What is exceptional, consequential, and imperative to your bond?  If the answers are not convergent with your core goals, values, and ideals...then you are bound to confuse the direction of your relationship.  Reevaluate and correct/modify (to the best of your ability) your situation...or find someone different.  Couples who are out of sync will stall...

...So don't stall.  Start by outlining strengths and weaknesses as seen through the eyes of your significant other...remember to truthfully identify the traits as opposed to ideally stating what you would assume to hear.  Now compare those strengths and weaknesses with what you strive to offer...the closer you are, the stronger your connection will be; the further apart...then the more misleading your relationship will be.  In a divergent situation, you must commit to a modification in your behavior in order to bridge that distension, ultimately being able to offer what you truly promised your mate and relationship.
Keep in mind that not all individuals fall within such a cut an dry type of evaluation/analysis...meaning you can always meet someone outside of the spectrum of what you are looking for that can change your entire perspective...its the old unexplained infatuation factor...it can strike anyone at any given moment, without warning.

Remember you can not control or change your mate.  But what you can control is your behavior, as well as, what you can and do contribute to your relationship.